Sailor SSIF
by Convergence-Eternal
Summary: Join the Sailor Scouts on another wacky adventure as they battle evil and combine forces with new friends to save the day. This story is inspired by the works of Darth Drafter and was created with help and advice from kirby42280, Niennor Night, Ka'Dira Ezra, and TheElephantInThePrideParade. Warning contains OC's, OOC moments, mild cannon defilement, and numerous cameos.
1. Train Spotting

Dumbledore was waiting for a train. The station was white and reminded him a bit of kings cross-station. Ah, yes he was dead. In light of recent events such a deed could be considered rather forgivable.

The head master smiled a little and looked around. Something felt wrong. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. He didn't know he should be meeting Harry. He didn't know what had happened to the boy. Albus Dumbledore was an old man with too many regrets.

A train would be arriving soon. He couldn't say for certain where it would lead him. Perhaps he would meet a congenial Spectre of death or finally be held accountable for his crimes. He had been having the strangest dreams about a death god with a rather large knife. Then again he hadn't slept in a very long time. He couldn't sleep here. All he could do was wait.

The story had come to an end. He'd lost.

His memories flittered through time. Staying awake to look up at the stars. His sister, his friend, and the boy all lost. Did the boy know he had his mother's eyes? Did Severus ever get to meet Lily? How had he let himself become this?

Tom never understood what it was like to love. Albus did. These tears fell uncertainly nonetheless. Albus didn't understand where they came from. Albus was alone in the end. He still didn't understand.

Two young men old enough to watch the world burn, 1942. Blood soaked soil, torn up snow, enough dead, and almost enough memories. The snowflakes didn't touch Albus. Where was love and justice then?

"Albus"

The ancient wizard turned around to see who had spoken. It was a familiar voice and it belonged to such a familiar face. In death he was younger then Dumbledore. He was as young as when they had first embraced.

"Grindelwald", murmured Albus.

The ancient wizard attempted to hide any reaction to this surprise appearance behind a mask of politeness. It wasn't working.

"You haven't aged a day", said the blonde haired wizard with a smile.

Albus nodded politely and tried to think of the appropriate thing to say to his special friend. A volatile mixture of animosity, regret, and lingering affection was stirring within Albus. Then it came to him. He knew what to say and how to express all these things he's felt through all the years. Albus opened his mouth to-

"Excuse me", came a different voice.

This voice belonged to an attractive young man with brown hair. He was wearing a blue shirt, dark trousers held up by suspenders, brown boots and an RAF great coat.

"Could you please tell me where I am?"

Dumbldore gave a genial smile. The unresolved sexual tention between him and his de aged erstwhile lover temporarily forgotten.

"That depends", began the ancient wizard, "Where do you think we are?"

"Looks like a train station", replied Jack Harkness.

"I suppose it does", said Dumbledore thoughtfully.

Their polite conversation was quickly derailed when a young blonde woman appeared. She was wearing bright colorful clothing and looked very very tired.

"Not again", she groaned.

It doesn't matter whether you are a Wizard, a vampire hunter or a Senshi. Resurrection sickness is a bitch.


	2. Shooting Star

It was a night like many before it in Nerima. The glittering stars made their salutations to the earth and a full moon was hung low in the sky. Beneath the nocturnal glory of the heavens was the hero of Nerima. Tonight out of the kindness of his own heart Kuno Tatewaki had nobly elected to meditate outside. That way the glittering eyes of the night could gaze upon his magnificence.

Yes, it was a night like any other in Nerima. Well, except for a falling star headed towards Kuno with blazing speed. That small detail would make a world of difference. The honorable and noble hero Kuno was struck in the heart. Crimson blossomed from the wound and noble blood oozed its way out.

As quickly as the pain came it also vanished. Flesh knit itself together and skin stretched itself across the fresh wound. Then a black rune shimmered for a moment across Kuno's forehead before vanishing unnoticed. The courageous hero of Nerima then passed out.

When the handsome Samurai had regained consciousness there was a beautiful noble woman sitting in front of him. Her skin was a swarthy tone and her eyes were crimson red. She smiled at him warmly enough for him to see her many rows of black teeth.

"M-Mother?", gasped Kuno.

He was right of course. She was his mother, just not the mother he had ever known.

"Its so good to see you again, my daughter."

Her smile stretched even further while her eyes gleamed. She reached out to touch her daughter's cheek. The hand went straight through. She was a recollection of a memory. In truth she had been dead for a long long time.

"My you've grown", she chuckled softly as she tried in vain to pet her child's hair.

The cold wind howled through the darkness. For a long while the wind was the only one that spoke while a mother expressed affection for her little one. He was so handsome, so strong, what more could an ancient space queen ever ask for?

He was also able to remember what his true mother looked like for just a moment. It flashed before his eyes and stood in sickening contrast to what lay before him.

"Your not my mother", whispered Kuno.

The lady of the night didn't stop petting his hair. Her smile gently faded away. She gazed serenely upon him while she spun together gentle words to set her daughters mind to rest.

"I am your mother. I was your mother. Long before you can imagine when this world was thousands of years younger you were by my side. This isn't your home though little one. We lived far far way. On a planet distant from these stars"

"I don't understand"

Her smile returned. It was softer then before. Her loving memories were tempered by the recollection of times long past.

"You are royalty my little one. Once you were the heir to a kingdom beyond the stars. It was just a speck in the glory of what once was yet it was yours nonetheless. Then darkness came. Monsters swallowed a thousand worlds. Unlike others I didn't have the strength to insure you would be resurrected with your birthright. I had to take a different approach. Now you are whole again my daughter"

"You mean that I'm a sailor soldier?"

"No of course not. Although we did imitate them a bit just to fuck with Queen Serenity. You should have seen the look on her face. But no my child you come from a much more noble strain."

Kuno nodded slowly.

"Just repeat after me", his ancient alien Queen mother advised, " Van Meat Fucker Prism Make up"

"Van Meat Fucker Prism Make up", Kuno shouted.

In a blaze of glory Kuno was stripped of his clothing and forced into a Sailor Suit. Sparkles of blue danced through the air while radiance sprang forth. Kuno gained nail polish, glitter, a fashionable dress, and was turned into a girl. After all its not like guys can be sailors or anything.

His mother watched her lovely daughter transform with pride. Everything was going just as planned.


	3. Reality Bites

Lorraine woke up at three in the morning. She did her hair and make up, redid her hair and make up, redid her hair again, and finally wiped off all the make up when she decided to go for a more natural look.

She had a date today, she was nervous, she was no longer fat but she was still nervous. The thing about being a plus sized youth is that the insecurities you build up don't just magically disappear. Neither do the various medical complications connected with all those fad diets you tried out to lose weight.

She was a bit chubby in Middle school so she was called the fat friend. By High school she'd halfway killed herself through dieting and just to add insult to injury her body still hadn't changed. Then after high school she finally lost those last few pounds only to discover she was . . . average.

A average girl how had to sleep a certain way at night. An average girl who still got nervous when people looked at her. An average girl who was going on a date with a stranger because at least strangers could halfway remember her name. She was tired of being the fat friend. She just wanted to be herself. If she only knew where it would lead her.

When she left the house she was reasonably dressed. Maybe her skirt was too short or maybe her t-shirt showed too much skin. She didn't really notice. Her heart was in her throat and every part of her screamed not tonight. Loraine mistook this for dating anxiety and decided to go ahead as planned. Step by step moving deeper towards the black.

They were to meet outside the Nekohaten Café. She didn't make it that far. Instead her lover of the night intercepted her. A dark alley, a close embrace, the build up to that final moment, and then it ended.

She was still alive but the whole romantic feel of it all was ruined. Some one had stabbed her erstwhile lover through the heart. Well that's a bit of a mood killer.

Loraine did what any sensible person would do. She screamed and ran, then she screamed louder and ran faster. Then she accidently hit into a street lamp and promptly fell unconscious. Looks like she could add broken nose to the list of average things about her.

When she woke up there was a Sailor Senshi standing over her. Sailor Senshi are the guardians of Tokyo who battle evil by midnight. They fought for love and justice. Loraine always thought this one girl at her school looked kind of like sailor moon. Loraine's parents thought she should keep her mouth shut.

Any ways one of the guardians was standing over her. She was the Pretty guardian Sailor Uranus. It was easy to recognize her because she had short hair and carried that sword around.

"Are you okay?", asked the defender of love justice.

"My boyfriend is dead", responded Lorraine.

Well that's not quite what happened. First off he wasn't really her boyfriend so that statement would be disingenuous. Secondly Loraine was badly concussed and bloodied so her statement didn't come out quite so clearly.

It sounded a bit more like a nasally, "Mumph calagar ugh durak".

Now Sailor Uranus wasn't exactly the worlds best linguist so she could make neither head nor tale of what that girl was saying. Rather then follow up with a serious of more in depth questions she just shrugged and took the girl to the hospital.

Loraine passed out again. She'd be in the hospital for a while longer. When she woke up she would be just yet another average girl who accidently crapped herself while she was unconscious. Could be worse though. At least this dignity crushing experience didn't involve treadmills.


	4. Moonlight Surprise

"Ughhh, I don't want to get up", whined Usagi. It was Monday, it was the morning, and a certain Mau cat was a hairs breadth away from getting punished in the name of the moon.

"You need to get up Usagi your friends are waiting for you."

"What?", mumbled the future Queen of Crystal Tokyo.

"Today you are . . . just get up already", chided Luna.

She still wasn't waking up. Time to pull out the big guns. Luna retracted her claws and . . . "STUPID CAT!".

Just outside Usagi's door all of the Senshi had gathered to wish her a happy anniversary. They got up expectantly as the door opened only to find themselves dodging flying moon cat. Makoto was a bit late on the draw and ended up getting a face full of Luna's rear end. It'll take a while to get that taste out of her mouth.

"Surprise", called out a group of bewildered friends. They'd known Usagi for years now so you'd think they would be used to this by now. If you thought that you would be wrong, dead wrong. Trying to predict a Tsukino is like pissing near a railroad line on a moonless night. Dangerous, inadvisable, unfortunately often attempted, and near guaranteed to end rather messily.

Usagi was in her pajamas. Her friends were all dressed up. There was cake although Makoto had partially flattened it when she fell. Luna was giving Usagi a death glare and every ones favorite little bunny was smiling nervously.

"Happy anniversary", offered Mercury helpfully.

"Yeah, woo that's totally what we're celebrating", added in Venus while she looked back and forth in a paranoid manner.

Rei resisted the urge to face palm while the outer scouts hung back to watch this all play out. Then the doorbell rang. Mamoru walked in dressed up in a tuxedo with a rose in hand. He walked up to Usagi and got on one knee.

"Here's a rose for the only women I'll ever love. With this gift I promise to cherish and love her forever. Till death and ever after until we meet once more"

"That's so sweet", said Venus who pulled a tissue out of her pocket.

Haruka meanwhile was just grinning. Michuru started holding Haruka's hand. Hotaru in the meantime started clapping. Ami started breaking out in hives and Makoto who was still recovering from the Mau missile started clapping along as well.

It was the perfect romantic moment. If only it could last forever.

Rei who was the only one not distracted by this overt show of affection saw Pluto slip out of the room. She thought about telling the others yet something stopped her. Maybe she didn't want to ruin the moment, perhaps she just trusted Setsuna, or there's even a chance part of her knew this was how it had to be.

This world was a powder keg and without realizing it Rei had provided a spark. As she looked back towards the happy couple part of her must have wondered what it would be like to watch the world burn. She'd dreamt of fire for far too long. Now even the sounds of her friends laughter could no longer drown out the silence. Wake up silent watcher of the flame. Wake up, and smell the ashes.

After that delightful and heartfelt moment they decided to cut the cake. A few of the braver guardians gnawed at it a little bit so as not to hurt Makoto's feelings. None of them wanted to find out what Makoto plus cat hair tasted like.

The party heated up a bit when the reincarnated Shitenou came to pay their respects to the couple. Nephrite unaware of what had gone down ate a bite of the cake. He then proceeded to like it so much he devoured the rest of the cake. Much to his bewilderment Makoto started blushing. He just couldn't figure out why. Perhaps she was just humbled that some one as attractive as him would like her cooking. Yes, that was certainly the most likely scenario.

Just to be sure he moved to her flank and sat down next to her. The room was crowded so getting there meant they were stuck together close. However there wasn't much room to stand up and his left side was his better side. Nephrite wasn't so cruel as to deny her a look at his beautiful self. Even reincarnated advisors have to be kind to their fans after all. Maybe if she played her cards right he might even give her a kiss.

The party was progressing great until Ami started checking her communicator. At first it was only every hour, then every thrity minutes, and finally at every ten minute interval. She kept on trying to get to Rei or Haruka and Michuru however people kept on getting in the way.

At long last near the end of the party she managed to pin Haruka into a corner just outside of every one else's line of sight.

"Ami what are you-"

"We've got a problem", whispered the blue haired defender of love and justice.

Haruka didn't say a word. She didn't have to. Instead her body language told Ami everything she needed to know. There was trust but she was anxious. Why here, why now, what is it?

"I've been tapping into the police and military traffic again. My computer has been tracking a series of anomalies. We need to get the Soldiers together. Not now but later. We need to know what we are up against before it's too late", the words came hushed as the night's breeze yet they stirred up a storm within Haruka's soul.

Visions flickered before her eyes. Her new Sailor family dying in front of her, losing Michuru again, and finally an image of something that happened a few nights ago. She remembered girl bleeding out on the ground.

Haruka wasn't blind. She'd read the headlines too. Girls had mysteriously gone missing. Several of the victims were found dead and drained of their blood. The news said it was the work of a serial killer yet something didn't feel right.

Just then the outer guardian caught Rei glance over at them out of the corner of her eye. Of course Rei felt it too. She was always the first to recognize things like this.

"When?"

"Tomorrow night, any sooner and it might be too late."

The blond haired guardian nodded and walked way. She went over towards Mamoru so that she could start laughing at something witty he had said. She had to keep a secret from her friends for a day then a night. It wouldn't be that hard she thought to herself. After lying to herself all these years how could this be any different. Of course Michuru would find out. She always did. Yet for the moment Haruka just nodded and smiled like she didn't have a clue. It should never be this easy.

Everyone started laughing when it came time to play pin the tail on the donkey. Mina went first and accidently pinned Rei in the rear. The image of Mina gently lifting her blindfold to peek up at a grumpy Rei was burned into their collective consciences. The Night wore on in the painted city of Tokyo. The full moon was out and was hung midway in the night sky. It all seemed as real as a recollection of a dream.

Makoto was the first to say goodbye as the night wound down. One by one they all gathered their stuff to leave. The Shitenou teleported away without a second thought in spite of how they were supposed to be blending in with society. Nephrite at least had the halfway decent excuse of no longer having a car. Mamoru decided to leave with a bit more tact and after a few heart felt farewells took a taxi back to work. There had been an emergency so had been called away from his own anniversary. The person who was supposed to be covering for him had been found in a gutter drained of their blood earlier this night. They were still alive but in no shape for work.

Just as every one else was about to part ways they notice a tall figure standing in the distance. Their clothes stuck tight to their form and remained motionless in the breeze.

"Get back inside", growled Haruka through gritted teeth.

"Its proboably just a homeless person", suggested Makoto.

"I said get back inside", repeated Haruka coldly.

Every one did as they were told except for Michuru who stayed by her lover's side. The figure remained where they were for the time it took Haruka to exhale in relief. The in a second breath they were a block away.

Their features were clearer now. She could see the pale flesh, the hooked nose, the hungry grin. One more breathe for the figure to be straight in front of them. She could see its ravenous beady black eyes and long curved fingers.

Rather then close in on them then it started clapping slowing. It tipped its hat slightly before razing its head further so they could see the fine lines of red running down its jaws. It was ever so rare that its prey remained so calm in its presence. Perhaps these misguided youths even mistook themselves for the hunters.

The beast extended a long claw towards them and stared deeply into their eyes. Then it stopped and peered over its shoulder. It's nostrils flared as the shadows around it contracted. Its beady eyes searched for objects that couldn't be there.

Just then the door flew open and six defenders of Love and justice stepped out behind Haruka and Michuru.

"Stop right there in the name of moon", cried Sailor moon.

The monster looked up to her perplexed. It immediately stopped what ever it had previously been doing.

"Standing outside of girls houses to creep on them is wrong. For love and justice, we will punish you!"

It raised its hand slightly to shield itself from the light. Then it lowered the hand slowly as a vague look of understanding started to form on its features.

"Ah, yes I am so sorry. I have learned my lesson. Now I will leave so that the women of Japan can loiter outside places in peace. But you have not won this time sailor moon. You must still defeat my . . . minions", exposited the monster.

It gave on last look towards them to make sure they bought it before it disappeared in a cluster of bats. The defenders of Love and Justice thought about giving chase however none of them really felt like flying.

"So that was easy", commented Venus.

Rubble exploded from a nearby building. A sailor clad in a suit black as midnight could be seen moving into the open. The Sailors squinted as their eyes adjusted to the darkness. Now they could see two more moving towards them. One had an uniform covered in creeping frost while the other had a bone white sailor suit with a captain's hat.

"Well at least our enemies look stylish", quipped Makoto.

While the inners shared witty one liners Haruka and Michuru had fallen behind them to transform.

"Uranus Planet Power Make up!"

"Neptune Planet Power Make up!"

Now the whole squad was a go. Time to kick ass.

"Stop right there in the name of the moon! It's wrong to destroy buildings and be minions for the forces of evil. In the name of the moon we will punish you!"

Said "Minnions" looked at each other. The middle one shrugged and they all stopped moving.

Uranus yelled, "Space Sword Blaster"

Two of the enemies were fast enough to dodge the strike. The middle one was not. The soldier in black was cut in half by the attack. Moments after the strike there was silence. Then a scream rose from the Sailor in white.

The Sailors watched the enemy charge towards them. The foe's eyes were wild and their breathing heavy. They were headed straight for Uranus.

"Earth Shaking"

"Deep Submerge"

Both flew over the villain's head. They were so close to Uranus she could feel their breath. The enemy was well over a head taller then her yet their bestial stance meant they met each other face to face.

The white suited sailor had one opportunity to see what a true soldier looks like before Uranus swung Excalibur. Crimson blossomed through the air. White and red hit the floor at Uranus's feet.

Two down, one to go. The ice blue soldier stood there in the moonlight. Unable to understand and unwilling to leave, ice cold tears trickled down their cheeks.

"It doesn't have to be this way. Just give up", cried out Sailor moon.

"No", responded the last soldier.

The defender of love and justice readied themselves. Rather then charging the Soldier of frost just fell to their knees. They looked back and forth between the black suited pieces of their friend.

"Moon, I'm picking up something on my radio computer", said Mercury.

The Blue haired soldier tapped a few buttons to play the radio frequency for all to hear.

"What's going on down there? Are the sailor scouts Brain washed or are they . . . "

Mercury cut the connection.

"It's been like that since the beginning of the battle. We've been tricked and now they're dead"

The scouts stood there for a long while. Then Venus walked out to the soldier in blue. She put a hand on the girls shoulder. The Moon was hung high up in the night's sky. The sailors had lost.


	5. Tomoe's Remedy

Dr. Tomoe was in the kitchen wearing an apron and a big smile. When the alarm he had set went off he knew it was time to take out the chocolate chip cookies he'd put in. Tomoe slipped on his oven mittens and then he pulled the delicious treats out.

As soon as he placed the tray on he heard the doorbell ring. Normally people only rang once but this specific person rang several times. He knew the order of those rings by heart, could this mean?

Tomoe rushed to the door without even bothering to take off his oven mits. He swung open the door to find the one thing he cared about more then anything else in the world. His daughter.

He didn't care she hadn't seen him in years. He didn't mind she had a mysterious burlap sack over her shoulders. Doctor Tomoe was so very happy to see his little girl again, or not so little girl. She'd grown so much. Today was the happiest moment of Dr. Tomoe's life. As he looked at Hotaru his only regret was that her mother wasn't alive to see how beautiful she'd become.

"Dad, I need some help", said his little angel.

Doctor Tomoe smiled warmly and gave her a big hug. Hotaru dropped the sack to return the embrace. The burlap sack made a strange squelching noise when it hit the floor.

"I need help resurrecting the dead", whispered Hotaru.

Doctor Tomoe smiled and hugged her tighter.

"I've been waiting to hear those words my whole life"

He then let go and went back to the kitchen.

"You should have some cookies and milk we resurrect the dead though Hotaru. Chocolate chip cookies are best when they're warm"

"Dad, the bag is leaking", his little one politely informed him.

"Ah yes, well you should still eat the cookies. I'll make the preparations for travel while you do. Today you get to see where daddy works"

Hotaru ate some delicious cookies, Doctor Tomoe threw the body bag in the back of his car, and all was right in the world. Hotaru's other daddy was so exited to spend some time with his daughter. He cleaned off the seat several times while he waited for her to finish eating, checked the air conditioning, and searched the radio stations for nice happy toon.

Soon as his little angel hopped in the car he sped off towards their destination. Santen's ultra secret research lab located underneath a Kentucky fried chicken restaurant. No one would ever expect the grand experiments located underneath the Colonials fried chicken. It was the perfect place to create what never should have been.

Doctor Tomoe parked in the parking lot, went to the back entrance, and then spoke the ultra secret passcode.

"The Colonials Will be done"

A second door appear next to the normal back door, which Doctor Tomoe then opened. No sooner had he and Hotaru entered then the door shut behind them. By the time they reached the bottom of the stairs the camouflage had reactivated. To the rest of the world said secret entrance would appear as nothing more then a dirty piece of wall with multiple mysterious white stains on it.

A nice pleasant A.I. with an voice eerily similar to that of John Cena said, " Welcome to Santen's consumer research center. Please wipe your shoes off at the front and door and cleanly dispose of any inhuman abominations you happen to create in the name of science"

Hotaru looked down at her shoes, she'd accidently put muddy footprints all across their nice beige carpet.

"Don't worry", explained her other father, "we just programmed in the first part of that warning to scare interns. We have mutant spider monkey cleaners that we release at the end of work every day. Sure they might sling their acidic fece's every now and then but over all they are wonderful workers"

Hotaru paled slightly.

"Don't worry, that was a joke was well. They don't sling feces any more. For the strangest reason ever since we outfitted them with remote detonated explosive collars they've become much better well behaved", explained Doctor Tomoe with a warm smile.

Doctor Tomoe ruffled his precious daughters hair good-naturedly. Then he looked around for the proper implements. They were easy enough to find. The hard part was heading back to the car to get the body. Oh, why were invisible doors so hard to find?

Soon as all that was dealt with he smiled towards his daughter. The good Doctor beamed warmly at his little angel and looked over towards one of switches.

"Would you like to do the honor?"

Hotaru pulled the switch and electric shocks brought the newly stitched together body back to life.

"It's alive!", called out Hotaru.

Doctor Tomoe wiped away a tear. They grow up so fast.

The victim-er, I mean lucky participant of their experiment was a blond girl wearing a black sailor suit. Making her whole once more was easy enough. All that they had to do was stitch the two parts of her back together again.

The blond girl blinked slowly. She squinted as she tried to adjust to the pitch black of the laboratory. As her mind tried to comprehend what had just happened her first words were, "What the Fu-"

"Great job", said Docter Tomoe as he clapped his daughter on the back.

"Now I should warn you that this experiment took a lot out of your test subject, so she will not be as strong as she was in her previous life"

 *** Crack ***

"Oh, look she's broken out of her restraints already. She's quite the clever girl, pulling at the stress points like that. What exactly was it that killed her Hotaru?"

"The Sailor Senshi", explained his lovely daughter.

The Doctor nodded at this and put an arm on his little angels shoulder. He knew she'd have to leave soon enough. In truth Pluto, Haruka, and Michiru were her true family. Her true parents, the family she always wanted, and the family she deserved. Still it felt so nice to have her by his side once more.

Sometimes you've got to enjoy the little things in life. Take them and cherish them before they pass. Hearing about how good your daughter is doing in school, getting a Christmas card with her in it, helping her resurrect the dead, and seeing her adorable smile.

He might not be her father any more but he'd never stop loving her like a daughter. So he made a silent prayer for his little angel. That she'd grow up to have a fulfilling and happy life, without him.


	6. The Lady In White

Ahhh, there's nothing quite like coming home to your loving wife after a long day/ night at work. Except when you were called to work on your anniversary. Then it wasn't too much fun.

Mamoru walked into the bedroom expecting to find his beautiful lover in her bed. That's not what he found. Instead there was a white clad sailor scout under the covers. Luckily for Mamoru he was able to avoid the hilarious hijinks of accidently crawling into to bed thinking this stranger was his Usagi. That's because said stranger was so big they barely fit in the Queen sized bed. Under different circumstances this might have actually been funny. There was certainly something comical about the stranger's feet dangling out of the bed frame.

This pretty suited interloper had short brown hair. Maybe she was related to Makoto or something. That would explain the size. Still it was better to play things safe. Mamoru was tired but he wasn't stupid. The future king of the silver millennium did the only sensible thing for some one of his nature to do in such a situation, he passed out on the floor.

Mr. Chiba woke up in need of two things: the first was a shower and the second was a thorough explanation from some one with a soothing voice. Mamoru would prefer to hear it from Ami although Rei and Michuru would also suffice. Perhaps what he needed was a nice strong drink.

There was just one small problem. Some one had taken all the booze. In its place was a note that read, "Gone to Sailor Meeting at Rei's. Will be back later. P.S. There's a wounded scout in the bed".

Ok, well that's nice to know.

Mamoru went to go check on the wounded scout. She wasn't there.

What happened next isn't quite appropriate. Let's just say that the result was . . . messy. Perhaps some one with a nice soothing voice will explain what happened. Like Ami, or Rei, or maybe even Michuru.

 **Meanwhile at the Sailor Senshi Meeting**

"Guys we've got a problem"

"What is it Ami?", asked Usagi.

"Chiba's gone missing again"

"What?"

"I just checked the camera's I installed at your place, he's not on any of them. Wait- never mind I found him"

"Where is he?"

"In the closet."

Rei raised an eye brow at that remark, "How'd he get in there", asked the Senshi of fire.

Ami tapped her mercury computer a few times with a look of concentration on her face, "Wait that's too far back. That's just him taking a group shower with the Shitenou.".

Ami tapped the computer a few more times. Her eyes flew wide open in surprise and at last she'd found the proper recording, "Oh dear".

"What is it?", asked Usagi emphatically.

"Ok", said Ami, " I'm going to explain this very slowly to you. Try not to get too worked up or over react. We should be able to fix this".

Usagi nodded.

Ami took a deep breath and then she began, " So you remember that White scout Uranus nearly cut in half. The one that I bandaged and that we put in your bed to recover, well Mamoru found her."

The one called sailor moon nodded again, so far so good.

"Any way's Mamoru passed out. The wounded Sailor woke up a bit earlier then he did. Waking up in an unfamiliar bed with a passed out boy just outside must have made her a bit nervous".

Usagi nodded yet again, she was taking this all rather well.

"So the girl got out of bed and hid behind the door. When Mamoru came in she grabbed him from behind and struck in a very specific area called the perineum. The blow was done with such force that for a brief moment he was lifted into the air and then fell. She then stored his unconscious body in a closet. He will wake up in a little bit with little ill effect. But the nature of the blow . . ."

Ami didn't want to say what it did out loud so she went up to Usagi to whisper it in her ear.

"What does retrograde mean?", asked Sailor Moon.

Ami blushed and spent the next thirty seconds whispering something in Usagi's ear.

Michiru in the mean time had caught on to what Ami was talking about and looked like she'd seen the dead. A few minutes later Mina remembered something her drunken anatomy teacher had told her once and she stared to blanch. Finally Mina whispered something in Rei's ear and Rei looked like she wanted to deck somebody in the face.

Ami realized the effect such innocent medical terms had on the group and quickly tried to calm every one down.

"Now its really not as bad as it sounds. She was probably just scarred and hit there by mistake. Besides she thinks we are her enemies already so how will charging in there help at all? The smartest option is to go in there calmly and talk this out".

Usagi's eyes were twitching. That wasn't good. Out of options and desperate to stop another incident Ami stood in front of the exit with her arms out.

"Violence will solve nothing. What's important is that we keep a level head and-"

"In the name of the moon I will punish her!", Screamed Sailor Moon.

Lesson of the day- Don't make Usagi's Mamoru **** in his pants. You will regret it.


	7. Handsomest Apprentice

The great and majestic Tatewaki Kuno was overcome with the urge to go galavanting on this fine and noble day. As luck would have it there was a nock at the door. There was a second nock at the door. Then there was a third nock at the door.

"Sasuke! Get the door", bellowed Kuno with great vigor.

There was no response. No ninja popped out of the floor tiles, or burst through a wall, or mysteriously appeared to apologize for his grave transgression of not appearing immediately.

"Sasuke, the door!", Commanded the master once more.

Still that wretched servant failed to answer his valiant masters call. Kuno arose and steeled himself for the task ahead. He must open the door himself. For although this was a peasants task his honor demanded he meet who ever awaited him. So it was that the humble hero strove headlong towards their destiny.

The door was swung open. A fair maiden with green hair awaited him. She was noble, powerful, and deceptively cunning. Could she be an ally or shall she be an enemy. Time would tell and Kuno would remain ever vigilant. As the guardian of Nerima he shall never let Ranma nor his vile minions corrupt this realm.

"Excuse me, would your sister happen to be here? I have something of the utmost importance to discuss with her"

"I'm afraid that Kodachi isn't here at the moment. What would your business with her be?"

This woman of noble birth gave Kuno a strange look. Something wasn't right here. Kuno could feel that she wasn't what she seemed to be. Who was she? What did she want? Would the shooting star of Nerima be forced to draw his blade once more?

With jaded eyes she asked the noble hero of Nerima a question. With one question the most glorious of adventures would soon begin. This powerful entity asked the shooting star, "What is your name?"

"My name is Kuno Tatewaki. I hail form an ancient and noble clan. A blade has been in my hands for longer then I care to remember. If you have come to this place seeking to spread evil then I shall slay you. For I am Nerima's shooting star, Kuno Tatewaki, Van Meat Fucker Make up!"

Before Setsuna's eyes this powerful young man turned into a beautiful sailor. The guardian of time took a step backwards. Her mind was still playing catch up. In the mean time her subconscious was running damage control.

Sailors arriving usually meant some great threat was approaching. This Sailor had appeared without warning. She didn't remember anything like them. Why was there a sailor here? How could they be so reckless as to reveal themselves? Van Meat Fucker Make up?

The next words that came out of Setsuna Meioh's mouth surprised even her. With an astonishingly serious expression she said to The Blue Thunder, " I'm here to take you under my wing. You are a sailor scout Kuno. It's my job to ensure you learn to act like one".

Yes that actually happened. Yet again Setsuna's mind was sent reeling. The waves of chaotic anti logic raging against her well-aged wisdom were so turbulent that she nearly missed his response. He said, "I accept".

Situation: Fubar, Fate of Crystal: uncertain, Prognosis: self-medication imminent, God Save the Queen.

"Well, we'd best not waste any time", wisely stated Setsuna, " Let's go for a walk. While we travel I'll fill you in on the history of the Silver millennium".

What Setsuna didn't realize was just how long their walk would take, what Kuno didn't realize is that they were headed to a far off purveyor of alcoholic beverages, and what neither of them realized was just how dearly said purveyor's services would be required.

They had a long and epic journey ahead of them, for tonight an honorable Samurai accompanied by the guardian of time was destined to get piss drunk. It was fate that as the sun set in the west two heroes shall embark on an izakaya crawl that shall be spoken of for generations. No restaurant shall be spared, no stockpile left untouched, no karaoke bar unvisited.

In the name of love and justice they were both going to yak.


	8. Blue Dragon

There was puke everywhere. She didn't know where she was. The guardian of space and time had no bloody idea what was going on.

"Good morning miss Pluto"

Sestuna looked up. Oh, look its doctor Tomoe. Good to know. Setsuana got on her hands and knees to get up off the floor. First she wretched violently, was puke supposed to have this much blood and bile in it?

Then she stood up. She was still swaying back and forth a bit. Why did her head hurt so much? She'd had wine from mercury before for crying out loud. For something on earth to get her this smashed she'd have to have drunk . . . wait where was her new apprentice?

"From the look on your face I can only assume that you are trying to figure out where you are or where your rather interesting friend is. You are here in my apartment, your interesting friend is in the bathroom"

Setsuna nodded weakly. She needed something to clear her head, a new pair of under wear, and something to eat. Some sleep would be nice. Not that she would get any. There's no rest for the weary and no end to the race. She was Sailor Pluto, the warden of space and time, not even death can stop her now.

"Mister Tomoe, have you seen your daughter recently"

Mister Tomoe gave her a surprised look.

"I think she's with her friends. Come to think of it she has been gone for a while"

Pluto knitted her eyebrows together and took a deep breath.

"Miss Pluto, you need your rest. I'll go find my daughter in just a moment. You have to listen to what I'm telling you. I am a doctor after all"

"A doctor in what exactly Mr. Tomoe?"

He looked at a clock in his apartment instead of answering her.

"I'm afraid I should be going know misses Pluto. You're free to use the bathroom once your friend is done being unconscious. Also there are a few spare clothes in my closet that just might fit you. Don't worry about the mess either. I have ways of dealing with such things", explained Hotaru's totally not insane father.

He left, Pluto ran, and outside the world looked so beautiful today.

Pluto got there first. The scouts were all sitting down in a circle with rings under their eyes. The poor things must have been awake all night. Mercury looked absolutely miserable and Sailor Moon looked sleepy.

Pluto cleared her throat.

"How was the team meeting?"

They all looked towards her, the outers appeared to have gone into shock. That's not good.

"Pluto, what happened to you?", exclaimed Haruka.

"What do you mean?"

"You're covered in blood, and vomit, and . . . other things"

"Well, I've got good new for you. I've found a new sailor scout"

"That's great", said Ami.

All the scouts were exchanging looks now.

"Is there something you want to tell me?"

Sailor Moon switched from sleepy to sleepy and nervous. Ami of course decided to yet again present things as gently as possible.

"We've met seven and a new moon cat, and we almost killed two of them"

Setsuna shrugged, "it happens to the best of us".

Honestly Setsuna was rather relieved. If she'd found out Ami had frozen all the sailors or that a mentally unstable vampire was gathering an army to wipe them out, then she'd be worried, however friendly fire was sort of par for the course.

"Well, you all should go home and get some sleep. I'll introduce myself to our new cannon fodder- I mean allies, and soon enough everything will be back to normal"

"What's normal?", asked Hotaru.

Pluto didn't quite know how to answer that question.

"On second thought things will go back to what's normal for us."

Satisfied with this all of the Sailor scouts starting filing out. Except for Rei who just sort of passed out on the floor. She'd probably find her bed soon enough.

Time to get back to work and- oh bloody hell what was that?

Sailor Pluto heard footsteps coming up from behind her. She turned around to find a sketchy looking man in a brown coat. Pluto got her self-ready. Either he must be another opponent with a terrible fashion sense or a pervert about to flash her. Either way she was way to tired for this shi-

"Sailor Pluto, I'm here to bring you in for crimes against the Ministry of magic"

Oh, fun.

"What exactly did I do?", she asked politely.

The Wizard pulled out there wand and looked at her incredulously.

"I'm not sure. They sent me so it couldn't have been too bad though. I think they said something about explosive under pants and elephants. Regardless I'll have to ask you to come with me"

Setsuna sighed.

"Could you at least tell me your name before you take me in"

The Auror nodded.

"Well, I don't see why not. My name is Rabastan Lestrange"

"It's very nice to meet you Mr. Lestrange. However you appear to be under the delusion that I will come quietly. Good-bye, Mr. Lestrange"

"Stupify!"

"Dead Scream"

It was tie. Pluto froze and he went flying. When Rabastan woke up he was back in the ministry of magic. When Pluto woke up she was back in her own bed. Both of them were dearly in need of answers, preferably from some one with a soothing voice.


	9. Void Train

Dumbledore was waiting for a train, a train that would take him far far away. He hoped this train would take him somewhere nice, but he didn't know for sure. Then again it didn't really matter. Any thing was better then waiting around here any longer.

Eventually his train arrived. It was the Hogwarts express. It was empty because this stop was just for him. Dumbledore got onto the train. Any thing was better then waiting around here any longer, anything.

When he got on he found all of the cabins locked except for one. The fifth cabin with the luggage compartment was left unlocked. In all his years riding the train to Hogwarts he'd never taken the fifth cabin. Why was this one unlocked?

The leather seats, the wood, and the musty aroma all spoke of a different time. Those days were gone now. Dumbledore made mistakes then and he'd fallen so low in the end. As he looked out the windowpane he expected to see familiar sights from his youth. Instead he saw only black. It was an empty expanse of black without end or beginning.

Albus closed his eyes and relaxed for a moment. Sure he didn't have a lemon sherbet or the like however things could certainly be so much worse. No Grindelwald, or Captain Jack, or Buffy. Now it was just a musty old train cabin and an old man filled with regret.

There was no lady to come by with a sweet cart. Nor were there any other students to make this trip more bearable. Dumbledore hummed a merry tune to himself. Would he get to see his mother one last time or Ariana?

Could he apologize, or say goodbye, or finally set him self free from this burden almost a century in the making? Could a few simple words throw off these chains, or wear away this heart of rust and set him free once more? No, that would never happen. Like a monster he emerged from the darkest void of human conception and that is exactly where he would go. Never again would Dumbledore see the light of the living world. Everything had to end some time. Now was as good a time as any.

The train came to a stop. It was neither softer nor harder then any stop it had made before. It was just another stop. Dumbledore always thought death was just another adventure for a well-prepared mind. It was time to put that theory to the test.

He got out of his cabin and headed down the aisle. The door was already swung open. Everything was ready for him. It was time to disembark. With an unsure step Dumbledore went out into the void. He didn't fade away nor cease to be. Instead a small circle of cobblestone around him was revealed. He heard the train's whistle as it left and he knew there was no going back.

Step by step more of his path was revealed. The darkness lifted and a thick fog replaced it. Rather then the spectacular flames Dumbledore had been expecting he instead found unremarkable gloom.

The slick cobblestone street seemed to stretch on forever. Not that Dumbledore minded. It's not like he had much else to do. Just as he was starting to enjoy his little walk it came to an end. He found himself in front of a pub of some sort unlike any he'd had the pleasure of seeing before.

The establishment possessed an mustard colored exterior which was slowly peeling off. Only two of the letters still lit up on its purple fluorescent sign. Its name was Pub Bar or PB. Albus moved towards it entrance. He approached its black oak door and turned the Pub Bars green copper doorknob.

In the Pub Bar was a circle of chairs. In one chair there was a Red haired woman in a purple dress, next was a white haired man with a black crescent moon on his forehead, in another seat was red haired women wearing a black star ornament on her neck, and finally there was a mysterious man in the darker part of the room smoking a cigarette. Also there were several empty seats.

The Illusive man blew out smoke at patted the chair next to him.

"Please, take a seat"

Dumbledore smiled.

"Thank you"

Now that everything was in order it was TIM's turn to speak.

"I'm the Illusive man and I'm a villain"

Everyone else responded, "Hi TIM"

The man in the shadows nodded. He blew out smoke and started to speak.

"Like many of you here my intentions were good. I dreamt of a better humanity, a stronger humanity, and for this dream I was punished in the name of the moon. What the fuck does that even mean?"

Every one gathered just shrugged except for Dumbledore. He thought about giving a speech to help explain the nature of Sailor Moon. Then he realized he'd just met her himself and was in no way entitled to just explain everything.

TIM started to grasp his cigarette a little bit tighter now.

"It all ended so softly the first time. I fought so hard for my ideals only to lose in the end. At least I ended up dying thinking about the planet I loved. The second time though. How I wish death could've been permanent"

The cigarette in his hands was starting to break.

"I thought death could have come then. It would have been fitting for Shepard to be the end. Instead I found myself alive again. I had died, and now I was back. Back in a younger universe with all the knowledge I'd built up from my defeat"

The cigarette was crushed. TIM moved forward slightly out of the shadows so they could see his blue eyes.

"Do you know what the meaning of insanity is? Nothing changed, no matter how hard I tried it still ended the same way. So what if the Alliance was now run by crystal Tokyo or if I was addressing Spectre Tenoh. Nothing changed. In the end I still died fighting for the world I loved"

TIM fell back into the shadows, where he belonged, and he wished that they could see the world like he did.

Next up was the villain to the left of TIM. Now it was time for white haired pansy with a black crescent moon on their fore head to speak.

"I am prince Demande and people call me a villain"

Every one else responded, " Hi Demande"

Demande pursed his lips.

"Well I'm here because I went back in time for Dat Ass-, I mean to help secure a safer life for my people. For the simple crime of supporting my clan and . . . maybe trying to rape sailor moon I was sent here"

Demande frowned.

"Later on I even saved her life! Do I really deserve to be here? I did a good dead!"

A few of the others nodded along. He sighed.

"Well no good dead goes unpunished as they say"

He sat down and it was the third villains turn to speak. She had red hair, red eyes, and rather eccentric clothing.

"My name is Eugiel and I'm a villain", she said.

"Hello Eudial", responded every one else.

"Well, I tried to get the Sailor Crystals for my master and it didn't work. I died because I'm afraid of snails"

That was all.

Dumbledore nodded smiled politely. Perhaps the afterlife wasn't so bad after all. He wondered if any of them would perhaps like a lemon drop. Perhaps he might have one or two of those in his robes.

After all as bad as things might be they could always get worse. He was just glad that it was Minerva and not him who had the misfortune of discovering that there was in fact a Scotum flavor of every flavored beans.

Then again she'd developed an cast iron stomach from all those years of eating tartan, Ginger Newts and boiled Venomous Tentacula roots. Dumbledore never did quite gather up the nerve to ask her why she insisted on eating that last one.

Regardless Dumbledore intended on making the most of this new adventure. Perhaps the crazy looking woman with spikes jutting out of her dress would know where the bathroom was.


	10. Meet The Villain

In the dark a gloomy corner of a men's Sauna the ancient vampire Astril was relaxing with his consensual friend Larry. The steam was doing wonder's at easing up the tension he had in his shoulders. This was almost as good as that time he trained monkeys to give back rubs. Too bad he ate the monkeys. He always did get the munchies' from smoking wolfs bane.

Astril was laid out on his back while Larry was sitting across from him. Today they just wanted to unwind and unload their problems on other people.

"Hey, Astril"

"Yeah"

"I'm really sorry to hash you buzz and all but I've got to get something off my chest. My dad died yesterday, my mother shot herself this morning, and all of my cousins below the age of 15 have mysteriously gone missing"

"Don't worry Larry. We all got to share our shit with our buddies every now and then. Also I'm really sorry about what happened to your family. Especially the last one, my bad."

"Nah, nah, its cool bro. You're a vampire and every thing I get it"

Astril poured some more water on the fire to get more steam. They'd need allot more of the dank for this bro talk to continue.

"Also sorry about screwing your great grandmother"

"Like I said. You're a vampire, I'm cool with it, screwing some ones ancestors back in the day comes with the territory"

"No, no, I mean sorry about doing it last Saturday"

"But she died last Saturday"

"Yeah, I guess it was too much for her little heart"

Now Larry put some more water on the fire. More dank was needed, time to resort to plan z. Larry pulled out a few J's and passed one to Astril.

"Thank you my brotha", said Astril.

Astril lit up his blunt using the fire. He started puffing but got nothing. How strange. Larry did the same with his blunt and violently convulsed before dying almost instantly. Oops, they must've mixed up who's joint was who's.

Time to dispose of a body.

Astril looked down at the body of his dead bro. Stuff like this really grinded his gears. Now he was starting to feel rather disagreeable. It was bright out side, however he didn't want his friend to swell up like a balloon so he had to get rid of him some how. This was gonna sting like a bitch.

Well there comes a time in every vampire's life when they must put their fortitude to the test. This was Astril's.

Astril picked up his buddy gently. Somberly the ancient vampire carried the perished remains outside of the Sauna. When the sun first kissed Larry's beautiful face Astril started screaming at the top of his lungs.

"Mother of a- Cossacks balls- use the anit-tank rifle- put Vaseline on it- In the name of moon!- * garbled incoherent swearing * - Then cover it in Chocolate!"

Astril began sprinting straight towards the nearest building as quickly as his legs could carry him. In other wards he slammed through a glass storefront window at Mach 2 with blinding speed. Larry was reduced to chunks and manikin limbs went everywhere.

Astril fell to his knee's.

"Nooo!"

To add insult to injury none other then Sailor moon burst out of a near by changing room. She was pissed.

"In the name of the moon I will punish you!", she vowed while charging the ancient vampire.

"Fuck it!", was Astril's response.

He started hauling tail and ran like only an ancient vampire on angel dust could. His escape velocity was so great that the shop caught on fire and Sailor moon was forced to make a hasty retreat.

A pale-fleshed tall dark haired man wearing a towel basked in flames was seen sprinting through the streets of Tokyo. His mad dash was caught by several security cameras and reviewed countless times by the local police.

And that his how Astril, the ancient and noble vampire of old, became classified as a level 1 sex offender in the Island nation of Japan.


	11. Meet the Expendables

Having a good first impression can make all the difference in the world. So when you're the new kid on the block and you've messed up then things can get pretty hard for you. When you saw your friends bleeding out on the ground and it was you that was in the wrong then what do you do? How can you forgive yourself for something like that? Where do you go from here?

After much deliberation seven girls and a cat came to some sort of compromise. If they couldn't change the past then they'd rework the future. So it was that this motely crew showed up outside of Setsuna's apartment with heavy hearts. Well, heavy hearts and several kegs.

When Mrs. Meioh opened the door to go get the newspaper she was met with this rather interesting sight. However this was morning Setsuna. So rather then freaking out or making a big fuss she just picked up the paper and walked back inside without even bothering to open up her eyes.

It wasn't until around 8:37 am when she was taking nice cold shower that she came to her senses.

Mrs. Meioh got into something sensible and went to answer the door. When she did she found seven really really apologetic young ladies and their uniquely colored feline friend.

"Can I help you young ladies?"

The taller one who was wearing worn out vans, a loose fitting shirt, and dangerously short shorts for some one her size stepped forward.

"Listen, we just came to apologize about everything. We heard you were the boss and we are really sorry about the way we acted a few days ago."

Setsuna gave them an odd tilted glance.

"I'm afraid that I don't know what you're talking about"

"So you're not ummm . . . you know"

Setsuna laughed.

"You girls look tired. How about all of you come in and then you can explain exactly who you think I am.", Setsuna suggested with a grin.

The girls followed this strange woman's request without so much as a second thought. Some would call this a breach in common sense. They'd be right. Even as the door closed behind them they didn't so much as consider that this might have been a bad idea.

"So, where are you from?", asked Setsuna.

"Well we're not exactly from around here"

"Another province perhaps?"

" You could say that"

Setsuna raised an eyebrow.

"Is there something I should know? After all you are guests in my home. It would be irresponsible of me not to inquire as to your state of well being"

They didn't like the look in her eyes.

"That reminds me", she said with an ever growing grin, "My name is Setsuna, what would yours happen to be?"

The brown haired one opened their mouth to answer when they felt a tap on their shoulder. One of their smaller friends in a sunflower dress was mouthing something and pointing towards the exit.

"Listen, ah Setsuna, it was really nice meeting you and everything but we really should be going. We've got to meet up with a friend and drop off these kegs"

"Oh, I understand. I hope to we meet again."

"Yeah, we'll see you later".

The group hustled out the door in such haste they forget both their kegs and their cat. Setsuna had never seen a more nervous group of girls in her whole life, and that's saying something.

She closed the door and turned to find the Teal cat they'd brought with them curled up asleep on one of the kegs. It had the strangest patch of black fur on its fore head. It almost looked like a Crescent moon.

"Hello there", she whispered, " and what might your name be?".

The teal cat opened its eyes.

"Meow"

Mrs. Meioh just chuckled, "Well its nice to meet you too".

 **Outside Setsuna's Dank Crib-**

"That was freaking Sketchy. Okay, so here's the new plan. We split up and find the sailors. We didn't come all the way to earth just to stand around or get killed off like sheep. Squad, roll out"

 **Day 1-**

Makoto was walking home from a shopping trip when she saw the strangest thing. There was this massive 18 year old trying in vain to help a little old lady cross the street. The trouble was that the giantess was still awkwardly tall even while bent over and crouched. Just as the signal was about to run out the girl just picks up the old lady and carries her across instead. That was weird.

Then things got weirder. Makoto dropped her keys when opening her apartment later on that day only for a man to trip over her. Really, that's what happened. Big mamma Makoto of course was so tough she barely even felt it. So she just picked up the keys and unlocked the door.

When Makoto fell asleep that night she had strange dreams about Ami. It had something to do with water, and bandages, and breakfast. The bravest brunet in all of Tokyo was going to need a new pair of sheets in the morning.

 **Day 2-**

Looks like she was going to have another peaceful day at the shrine. Yep, looks like it would be another dull day for Rei Hino. She'd already swept away all the ashes and tended to the sacred fire. Scrubbing the floor was finally starting to get boring too. Her back hurt a little as well. She was staring to think that passing out on the floor a few days ago wasn't such a good idea after all.

Today there was a visitor. This wanderer had blonde hair, tan skin, and dark blue eyes. Whenever Rei tried to look her in the eye she would look away. The girl was also shivering. She couldn't have been much older then sixteen. What was she doing here?

"Are you okay?"

"No"

Rei didn't understand. She didn't understand why she had that look in her eye. Why was she shaking? Why was she so afraid?

"You can stay here if you'd like. When you're ready to talk, I'll be here"

The girl nodded. Neither of them left the room. Eventually Rei walked over to put a hand on the girls shoulder. Even if she couldn't understand she'd still be here to help. She wasn't leaving anytime soon.

Now there were tears in the girl's eyes. They were tears of joy. Some one finally cared. At long last there was a light in this world of shadow and doubt. There was a defender of love and justice. There was Rei Hino.

 **Day 3-**

Ami was in the library today. She'd decided to learn Pashto. As she waltzed through the corridors she noticed the strangest thing. Every single book she was looking for had already been checked out. Normally she wouldn't mind. After all she was a complex person who had other things to do besides study and learn difficult languages for fun.

After about three hours of wandering about she saw a girl walk into the library. A girl wearing a sunflower dress, a girl carrying a big stack of books, a girl carrying a big stack of books that Ami had spent the last three hours looking for.

The girl in the sunflower dress dropped off the books and then left the library. Ami however wasn't really that interesting in learning Pashto anymore. She'd just remembered that a new thesis on quantum physics had come out. Now that was worth reading. Hopefully something about it would show up in the newspaper.

 **Day 4-**

Hotaru was at the video store when she heard the door swing open. It was around ten minutes before closing time. Looks like she wasn't the only one who was trying to rent a movie last minute.

It was a little odd. No reason to make a fuss or anything. Any ways she was about to check out the movie when the fellow last second visitor came up to say hello.

"You're that really nice girl. I'd just like to thank you for everything that you've done"

Hotaru's eyes went wide.

"What . . . what did I do?"

This strange girl took a few steps closer to whisper something in her ear.

"Bringing me back from the dead"

Hotaru smiled.

"You're welcome"

The blond haired girl with short hair and light blue eyes took a few steps back.

"So, what are you renting?"

"Frankenstein"

"That's cool"

Hotaru asked gently, "Do you want to come over?".

The girl who was not wearing a black sailor suit right now smiled.

 **Day 5-**

Ding-dong

"Who is it?"

"Rice sales men"

"Be there in a minute"

Mina pulled on something less revealing and went to open the door. There was a dark skinned rice sales woman at the door. She was about 16, well built, and dressed up like a sales person should be.

"So . . . rice?"

"Sorry mam. Today we are having a 90% off sale for charity. 100% of your purchase goes to sick children in need".

"I'll buy fifty"

"Fifty cups?"

"Fifty bags"

"Are you sure about that mam?"

"Shut up and take my money"

"Okay. Well I'd like to thank you for your purchase and- Oh my what's that over there!"

"What?"

Mina turned around; when she looked forward again the rice sales woman was gone. Then she heard glass crack so she looked back around again.

"Shadow Prism Power"

Mina looked forward again. The Sales woman was back with fifty bags stacked around her.

"So will that be all mam?"

"Sure", said Mina.

Mina handed her the Yen and waved goodbye. Apparently the magic of good will and charity could teleport in bags of rice now.

 **Day 6-**

When in a long-term relationship it's important to have a little fun once in a while. For some it's going to Nascar races together, for others its going to county fairs, and for those lucky few spending time together any where is enough.

For reasons unknown Usagi and Mamoru had decided to go to a restaurant called the Cat Café. When they got there the place was packed. The place was sort of a local hit due to its delicious cuisine and the random martial arts fights that would break out inside it.

Unfortunately the place so packed that only one table was open. The only table left was next to some one with blonde hair and some one with bluish green hair.

"Haruka, Michuru, you guys came here too?", exclaimed Sailor moon.

They smiled. Apparently tonight was going to be a double date.

Mamoru and Michiru started talking about boring medical stuff. Not cool stuff like cars or shopping. That left Haruka and Usagi to catch up and ask the hard questions.

"So how have you two been doing?", inquired Usagi.

"Pretty good", answered Haruka.

"That's good", said Usagi.

A waitress with purple hair and red eye's arrived to take their orders.

"I'll have two orders of the Tenshindon and one order of white rice"

"That's a lot of food", commented Mamoru.

"I'll need the energy for tonight", elaborated Haruka.

"Anything else?", asked the waitress.

"That'll be all for me"

The Waitress turned towards Usagi.

"I'll have one order of: Raman, Tanmen, Chaahan, Chaashumen, Wontons, Gyoza, Yakisoba, Wontonmen, Champon, Shumai, Kantima, Moyashi Soba, Gomuku Wanton, Ebi Chaahan, white rice, Suigyooza, Yasai, Tamago, Gomuku Soba, Chuukadon, Kani Tama Soba, Tenshidon, Ebi Soba, Yasai Itame, and Subata Nirareba Itame"

"Is that all?"

"Would you happen to have any volcanically spicy Maabo-tofu?"

"No"

"Then that's all"

The waitress then took both Mamoru's and Michiru's much more reasonable and well thought out orders.

" Mamoru", said Haruka, "some times I can't tell whether or not you are the luckiest man in the world"

"Well as long as I'm with the woman I love what more could I possibly need?"

"A bigger wallet", suggested Michuru.

Speaking of wallets- out of nowhere a monster attacked the restaurant. It was hunched over and shirtless with long dangly limbs. It's shambled about crying aloud.

"Meat!", it bellowed.

Usagi, Mamoru, Neptune, and Haruka were all about to find somewhere to transform when something not so unusual happened. Two young ladies from a nearby table got out of there seats.

One of them slammed the monster over the head and then the other one grabbed it from behind. She put a hand over its mouth to muffle its cries as she dragged it out of the restaurant. The second one followed her out after placing some yen on their table to pay for the dinner.

 **Outside of Setsuna's Dank Crib**

"So did any one find the sailors?"

"No"

"Nope"

"No"

"No"

"No", answered two in unison

"Meat!"

The leader nodded, close enough.

"Well, we will find them again one day. Granted it'll probably be right before some big battle and then we'll all get slaughtered. On that note lets go turn up!"

The Squad started partying outside of Sestuna's Crib. They did this in full view of all passers by. And not a fuck was given that day.


	12. Meet The Fortuneteller

**AN:** This chapter is contains a character from the fanfic If everything's a Dream, please wake me up. It's way better then SSIF and if you are a fan of the Mortal Instruments Series then it's a must read.

* * *

 **ASTRIL**

Another day, why did it have to be another day? The day just brought more sleep and more memories. It'd been so long since he'd fast fed. Good, it ought to stay that way. The decay and waning was a release. If time was running out then what could be more fun then counting the grains of sand in the hour glass.

Couldn't it just stay night?

No, that doesn't happen. In this world there was light. There were a thousand things to remind him of Larry. There was also Sailor moon. No escape from the past by daylight, nowhere to run by moonlight, the walls were closing in all around him.

Every one knows there are few things quite as dangerous as a cornered animal. The same often holds true for vampires. You'd better have plenty of fire and stakes ready when cornering them. So it was that the ancient noble, level 1 sex offender, Astril made a rather questionable decision.

They would go to New York City, they would find a fortuneteller, find out what they needed to know, and then go out in a blaze of glory.

 **Several Hours, one too many shots, and a hijacked SR-71 black bird later . . .**

 **Do you want a taco?** was playing at the club when Astril got there. He'd headed to the Blood Moon. Swagger walk engage!

Astril glided over to the bar women smoothly. They barely even nocked into any of the clubs other denizens on the way there. "Excuse me", said the ancient vampire, "is there a warlock in the house?"

"Yeah", said the bar women. She pointed to a dark booth in the corner. " Thank you very much", responded the friendly neighborhood Sailor moon villain. Every one was so helpful in this nightclub. This was going great.

In fact things were going so great that they decided to take an extra hit of Columbian marching powder. That's the stuff. Things were so much clearer now, or were they?

Regardless, the way that they saw things, the night went started off a something like this.

1\. Walk into booth. Why is it so dark?

2\. Meet the friendly warlock. The friendly warlock has bat wings. That's cool.

3\. Roll for Diplomacy. What? A one? This cannot be!

4\. Defecate in trousers repeatedly. Get the mother of all headaches while that white gold slowly wears off.

Now the ancient vampires vision was clear again. They were on top of a table, looking down at a warlock who wasn't the least bit amused. She was beautiful and most likely deadly. "Hey, my names Astril whats yours?". She didn't respond right away. What made this worse is that she looked eerily familiar to a woman who'd tried to kill him about a centaury ago. Had to be a coincidence though right?

"My name is Niennor", she said. She was staring him down now. Maybe it was the way her dark raven hair and black wings blended into the neighboring shadows, or maybe it was the blood red drink she was holding either way Astril didn't like where this was going.

His eyes met hers, her eyes met his, and she said, "Please get off my table". He did, and soon he was seated. Time to do business.

"Some one told me you were a pretty good fortune teller and I'm willing to pay allot of money for that kind of help right now. Name any price and I'll pay it."

"Your soul", she offered with a grin.

"Okay, maybe something a bit lower then that. Like an arm, or a leg, or this big bag of gold I've got in my pocket."

"The gold will do for now. Cause any more trouble and I'll remove your arms free of charge".

"Cool yeah whatever, can I have my fortune now?"

Niennor rolled her eyes and pulled out a stack of tarot cards. She drew six, furrowed her eyebrows, and then set the cards on fire. Next thing she did was close her blood red eyes for a moment.

"In the far far future five young girls will . . ."

"Hold on a minute. Don't you have anything that will help me in the immediate future?"

"Fine, you'll take an arrow to the knee", she said.

"That's it, there isn't anything else?"

"Well, there might be but it wouldn't be immediate enough to warrant your attention", she explained with a devious grin.

Astril placed the gold on the table. Then they got out of the seat and started backing out of the room slowly. Right before the vampire exited they stopped to say, "Thank you". No sooner had the vampire exited then they heard the sound of malevolent laughter.

Meanwhile the DJ had changed the song yet again. This time it was **Knee Deep** by Job For A Cowboy .

A few of the clubs denizens started grumbling. It wasn't really the DJ's fault though. She was just a janitor filling in for the previous DJ ever since the "accident". Spontaneous combustion is such a tragedy.

Life is precious. Don't throw it way by playing sad songs in a club notorious for it's varied patrons. Some of those patrons just so happen to be warlocks and warlocks like all other manner of supernatural creatures go through painful break ups too. So if the high warlock of Brooklyn ever tells you to change a song then you'd best comply. However that's an Aesop for another story.

The moral of this story is don't fuck with love and justice. Which is what some poor delusional vampire is about to find out in the not so immediate future.


	13. Meet the Heroes

**AN:** The following chapter contains excerpts and characters taken from kirby42280's Fanfic called Sailor Constellations. It is amazing, and is way better then this Fanfic. You should read it. Also parts of the following chapter are inspired by Early Morning Revelations written by GraphicArtist13.

* * *

When she closed her eyes she could almost feel the rain. It was wet, it was sticky, and it was everywhere. She opened her eyes. Red slicked roofs, crimson ground, and the city she learned to love. Haruka-Papa took her driving down that street once. Michuru-Mama played at that music hall. Her friend took her to that ice cream shop. She smiled then because she was with people she loved. She smiled now because- she didn't actually know why she was smiling now. Did she like the rain, did she like the taste, or was she stuck in a dream and unable to wake up?

Hotaru did wake up. Her pajama's were stuck tight to her. There was blood in her mouth and it wasn't hers. She'd had that dream again. Where everything was bathed in red. She was just glad she woke up at that part. When she had this dream a few nights ago . . . never mind, she didn't want to think about that.

It was raining tonight. Hotaru used to like the sound of rain. Not tonight. Tonight she was alone and her feet were cold. There was no one to snuggle with and the blankets were too hot. She didn't want to be alone tonight.

Hotaru heard a nock. She thought she'd imagined it. Then she heard it again. She tip toed to the door to check who it was.

The lady at the door had a nice smile. It was really gentle. Hotaru liked that. The woman was also wearing a big coat and very wet. She had a funny hat and big military boots. Her eyes were brown and soft. She bent forward a bit to talk.

"Excuse me, are you Hotaru Tomeo"

"Yes"

"My name is Kate, and I'm here to help"

Interrogator Katelyn opened her jacket slightly to flash a silver Aquila.

"Come in", said Hotaru.

The interrogator walked in and Hotaru closed the door behind her. It was so much warmer inside. The Interrogator took off her coat along with her boots. She then placed both of them by the door.

Miss Tomoe caught herself staring at the woman. Without her big coat or boots on she didn't look so big. Her body was petite and lithe like a bobcat's. She also had scars going down her arms. Some were big, some were small, some were jagged and some were long.

"Where did you get those from?", asked Hotaru.

"From having too many memories. If you think these are bad you should see the ones on my heart"

" I used to have a lot of those too, then I met my friends"

The interrogator just chuckled.

"Where did you get those from?"

The Interrogator was smiling wistfully. Hotaru was not. Instead she had a very serious look on her face.

"Excuse me, are you the woman who cares too much?"

"Yes"

"My name is Hotaru, will you be my friend?"

The smile on the woman's face vanished. Her soft brown eyes started to sparkle. Then drops fell onto her face. They fell as steady as the rain.

"Yes", answered Interrogator Katelyn.

In the morning there was work to be done. It could wait. She didn't want to be alone any more.

The woman took off her hat and started smiling again. One thing led to another and they both ended up curled up next to each other on the bed. The woman who cared her too much held her just like Haruka-Papa did.

"Would you like to hear a story?", she whispered.

"Yes", whispered back Hotaru.

"How about I tell you the story of Bjorn the Fell handed and all the little space wolves".

Hotaru answered back by tugging the arms around her tighter.

"Now not so long ago on the world of Fenris . . ."

~The Next Morning~

When Hotaru woke up there weren't any arms around her. The bed was empty. She reached across the bed to make sure. There wasn't any one there.

"Was it all a dream?", she muttered.

No, it couldn't have been. She curled herself up in a ball. Tears welled up in her eyes. It couldn't be. Not one more night alone. Not one more moment alone. It was so cold last night. Did she imagine those gentle arms around her? Did that gentle voice comforting her in the dead of the night come from inside her head? It couldn't have, it couldn't have, it couldn't have- there was a melody now.

She could hear some one humming. The song was complex at some parts while simple at others. Hotaru liked the melody. She curled up for a bit to listen to it. A crooked smile formed on her lips. If only Pluto was here, if only Haruka was here, if only Michuru was here, or Chibi-Usa, or her friends, or any one. She didn't like to be alone.

The door creaked open and the humming stopped. Hotaru closed her eyes. When she opened them the woman was with her again.

"What was that noise?"

"Regentropfen, the song of krieg. It was written a long long time ago"

"It's pretty"

Hotaru closed her eye's one last time. When she back fell asleep she didn't feel so very alone any more. What a shame she still had to dream.

 **Meanwhile in the Future . . .**

The Sailor Constellations, defenders of love and justice, from the FUTURE had journeyed back to earth with Sailor Saturn IN THE FUTURE. They had arrived in Crystal Tokyo to get a brief run down of what was going on before making their way to the battlefield.

Only they didn't get that explanation. Instead they appeared right behind the enemy Sailor mini moon and the Sailor quartet were currently battling with.

"Do you think this is my darkest hour?" The enemy asked. "Well, then, I must not have been spending enough time in the light because it'll have to get a whole lot darker then this before I give up!"

"SAILOR ALDERBAN!" Sailor mini moon yelled in surprise after her eyes focused on the new arrivals.

"Hello ladies! Care for some assistance?"

With a nod from the five girls, the sailor Constellations started to attack the enemy, a man name Astril who happened to also be a vampire. With different attacks, they were able to hit their new target, especially Sailor Rigel who aimed her poison arrow at him, but ended up hitting his knee because he went to dodge her attack.

 **Earlier in the past, somewhere else . . .**

Crack whores, Pink elephants, cats, piss, why did everything around him have to smell like piss? That's what Astril was wondering as he emptied another 24 ounce Mikey.

"Look like I'll have buy another one"

Now Astril was wondering something different. He was wondering why there was a telephone booth in a dark secluded alley.

"It looks like a blue telephone booth. A blue telephone booth?"

"Excuse me, I was wondering if you might be interested in giving up your vampiric ways and becoming a helpful member of society"

"Nice dapper suit dude, did you get puked out by the great Gatsby or something?"

The person Astril was talking to, he didn't really know Who he was talking to, didn't take too kindly to this. Astril couldn't make out their face in the darkness. But it didn't take Sherlock Holmes to figure out this man wanted to punch him.

"Well . . . I'm sorry about this", said the Doctor.

Astril got hit so hard that they could see little vampire bats circling around their head. Just kidding. They got hit so hard everything went black for a moment. When they came to, their limp body was being dragged into a Tardis.

"It's a good thing I kidnapped you when I did. At the rate I'm going if I'd decided to kidnap you later on in my life. . . . well, Allons-y!"

"You monster", murmered Astril.

"Finally caught on have we", said the Doctor with a grin, " you should have accepted my offer when I gave it to you the first time. I don't often give second chances. Now lets see how the Future treats you"

 **Meanwhile in the FUTURE . . .**

Pain shot through their body, time moved so slowly, they could hear laughter ricocheting through their head. What a way to end it all: Sailor moon, the fortuneteller, Sailors of the FUTURE, and now this.

Might as well go out smiling, might as well go out with a laugh, might as well, hold on what were the sailors doing right now?

"Evil Doer", said sailor moon venomously.

The sailor quartet was lined up right behind her, and Juno was giving a positively vicious grin. Little did Astril realize it but the Constellations were looking at him the exact same way.

"Girls! Lets give our guest a Crystal Tokyo welcome", yelled Sailor Moon.

With that, sailor moon and the sailor quartet proceeded to attack. The second the enemy reached them Ceres struck with her sickle, Pallas with her spear, Vesta with her bow and arrow, Juno with her nun chucks MADE OUT OF CANADIEN LUMBER, and finally Sailor mini moon walked forward to Spartan kick Astril.

Astril fell right on his rear and by the time they got up they weren't feeling so confident any more.

"Hey freak, over here", Came a voice from behind him.

The villain spun around to find the Sailor Constellations all lined up. They were here to kick butt and ball dance, and they didn't really feel like ball dancing right now.

"RIGEL LASER BLAST!"

An energy beam cut into Astril leaving them barely conscious enough to notice the-

"METEOR SHOWER!"

Which came from Ceres behind them, buckling their spine and shattering their bones like they were made up glass. However their body didn't even have time to crumple before-

"OMICRON LASER BLAST!"

Less and less of the villain could be distinguished as part of a living thing, too bad they couldn't die just yet. Not before-

"METEOR SHOWER!"

"POLARIS LASER BLAST!"

"METEOR SHOWER!"

"CAPELLA LASER BLAST!"

"ALDEBARAN LASER BLAST!"

The pile of bubbling flesh still endured, time for a little-

"RIGEL DOUBLE LASER BLAST!"

To vaporize Sinew-

"OMICRON DOUBLE LASER BLAST!"

To cauterize flesh-

"POLARIS DOUBLE LASER BLAST!"

To burst what few blood vessels remained-

"CAPELLA DOUBLE LASER BLAST!"

Forced what was left to gurgle madly against the silence-

"ALDEBARAN DOUBLE LASER BLAST!"

Burned away most of what is left, call it one last act of mercy.

The funny thing was that these weren't even close to their final attacks. If they'd gone full out from the beginning then they could have destroyed this enemy in only seven strikes.

It was so pitiful that the attacks they normally used to wear the enemy down in preparation for the healing had instead worn away this maggot to nothing. There was no chance left to heal this pound of writhing mass that had no mouth and could not scream.

Mini Moon of course realized this. So she walked up to end it as cleanly as possible. The Sailor Quartet followed her. They new what was coming next.

"I'm sorry about this", said Mini Moon.

Strange sputtering noises erupted from the writhing pile of flesh.

"PINK LADIES FREEZING KISS!", cried Vesta, Juno, Pallas, Ceres, and Sailor Mini Moon in unison to form their attack.

It struck and the villain was no more.

Unsure of what to do next Sailor Mini Moon, the sailor quartet and the Sailor Constellations just stood there. The strangeness of the moment was difficult to comprehend for the Sailors. All the things that pass beyond perception yet linger inside the prison of the mind. None of them could find a word for this moment, and they were wondering whether one even existed.

Something stifled them out of their stupor. It was the sound of some one clapping. They didn't know Who it was though. Not, at least, until they came out of the shadows.

"Now let's get you back to the past"

"What?", said Mini Moon.

"It's such a shame we can't save all of them. Well, every one hop in the Tardis"

"I think that I should ask my parents first", said Mini Moon.

"Fantastic! Well she's already given her permission so that's all squared away. She just doesn't realize it then and can't remember it now"

"Who are you?", asked Rigel.

"Does it really need saying?", asked the Doctor.

Every one just stood where they were in a stunned silence.

" Wellll . . . I'm sure it'll all be fine. Your not running away in fear yet, Brilliant! This is a great start"

 **Meanwhile in the past . . .**

Today when Setsuna came home she found two letters. One letter she discovered was from an investigator and one from a doctor. The investigators letter told her that the threat they discussed would be dealt with. The Doctors letter contained only two words.

"Good Luck"


	14. Magic is Might pt 1

**A Brief Synopsis of Usagi's Morning**

1:05 am, Usagi feels hot. She can't fall back asleep.

3:15 am, High fever, a running nose, and terrible coughing all make Usagi the most miserable girl in Tokyo.

5:15 am, Mamoru is worried, decides to go to the store to buy tissues.

5:30 am, The brave defender of love and justice, Usagi Tsukino, just barely makes it to the bathroom in time to experience the diarrhea equivalent of the Tsar Bomb.

5:45 am, Mamoru returns to find his loved one unconscious on the toilet. Briefly considers calling hospital. Decides to call her four best friends instead.

5:46 am, Mina arrives.

5:59 am, Ami and Makoto arrive.

6:02 am, Rei arrives.

6:15 am, Mamoru contacts Setsuna.

6:43 am, Mina decides to make breakfast for Usagi. Mamoru tries it, and is sent to the hospital for food poisoning.

7:00 am, Mina promises Usagi she'll fix the Tv so they can watch the Tuxedo Rider finale.

7:08 am, Haruka and Michiru arrive. Pluto is busy and Hotaru is still unaccounted for.

8:08 am, Vampire TV repair guy shows up, fixes tv, asks if they've seen any robed figures.

8:17 am, Seven robed figures show up, and then a tank appears out of a time portal several feet above the robed figures. Splat.

9:00 am, The Doctor has arrived.

Usagi had a pretty tough morning, and now its time for her to have an even rougher day.

So Usagi, Ami, Mina, Rei, Makoto, a Mako tank, the Doctor, Sailor mini moon, the sailor quartet, and the sailor constellations are all in one apartment together when Pluto comes flying in through a window.

Shattered glass, blood, and bits of torn flesh come with her. As soon as she hits the floor of the apartment a sketchy looking man in a brown coat appears as well.

"This is your last chance Pluto. I've asked nicely, the ministry has sent numerous strongly worded letters to your address, and now you will be coming with me"

"No she won't!", exclaimed Mina.

The Auror looked around and took stock of their surroundings. Surrounded, check. Possible civilians in the area, check. Close quarters fighting, enemy armor on the battlefield, what he could only assume must be a time lord, and no less then nine possible Senshi straight ahead. Bloody fantastic.

Mr. Lestrange threw his head back and let out a bout of maniacal laughter. As Setsuna got off the ground he raised his wand towards her.

Setsuna gritted her teeth and spat out blood. Slowly she got up onto her feet so that she could look the coward known as Rabastan Lestrange in the eye.

The Auror wordlessly cast a spell. The flash of white light struck her dead center. Her whole body froze and she fell backwards. Pluto was left paralyzed, spread eagle on the floor, only able to look on as the wizard approached her.

Before Mina could beat Rabastan black and blue, before Usagi cough out blood and attempt to declare something in the name of love and justice, before Rei or Ami or Makoto could transform, before Haruka and Michuru could transform, before any of the Sailor Constellations or Mini moon or the Sailor quartet could attack, before the doctor could spout a one liner, before the 155 mm gun of the Mako tank could turn to blow Rabastan to smithereens, something happened.

"Van Meat Fucker Prism Make Up!"

The shooting star of Nerima leapt into the apartment through the broken window. They saw Setsuna lying there on the floor and they lunged forward with their sword at Rabastan. This bone-shattering blow missed the Auror by scant millimeters. The air pressure from the strike alone was enough to make a deep gash in the floor.

Mr. Lestrange rolled forwards to avoid the strike then turned on a dime to face the Blue thunder.

"I am Kuno Tatewaki, defender of love and justice, and you vile villain have made a very serious mistake".

Kuno threw their wooden practice boken to the side so that they could draw their steel family blade.

"You will pay for you insolence", Kuno whispered, " YOU WILL PAY FOR HURTING MY SENSEI!"

Kuno's dress was blue as the rivers of Nerima, her blade was quick as thunder, and light danced dangerously in her eyes. A lifetime of anger and regret lead up to this one moment. They would not fail. In the name of honor, in the name of their mentor, in the name of love and justice, they would end this.

Kuno lunged forward only for the Auror to apparate away, they spun around to find Rabastan standing in front of the window they'd entered from. Rabastan smiled in the manner of a man who already knew they were dead. They raised a wand towards Kuno's sword and whispered a spell.

"Gemino"

Now there was a copy of Kuno's sword in his hands. As the blue thunder of Nerima charged, Mr. Lestrange started laughing uncontrollably. He laughed as their blades met, laughed as Kuno's sword broke his, and laughed as they both tumbled out the window. Suddenly, the laughter stopped.

9:37 am Usagi's beloved Mamoru-chan returns back home after making a miraculous recovery. He brings flowers.


	15. Magic is Might pt 2

In house hold after household radios crackled to life. There was to be a special message from none other then the minister of magic today. Such things rarely happened in magical Brittan. Today Kingsley Shacklebolt would speak, and the Wizarding world will listen.

"As you no doubt have heard a strike force has been assembled to retake the Island of Japan from the undead. We do this not for wizards, not for muggles, but for the greater good of all humanity

The combined force of the ministry, countless volunteers from every part of wizarding society, goblins, werewolves, vampires, and a great many others have been deployed and are now within striking distance of the Japanese home islands.

We are well aware that the casualties will be horrendous. They've known that we were coming for a while now. They're well dug in and they won't come quietly. Well neither will we. The full force of the world stands arranged off of their shores.

Ex minister Cornelius Fudge has agreed to lead this operation. With the help of the British government our forces will arrive within the hour. For the brave souls out there on those boats this might just be their final hour.

With any luck, we might not be too late".

Across the sea, near a far off land, a Wizard stood aboard the deck of the MS Polarfront. He was a man like any other Wizard. He'd made mistakes and had fallen down more times then he cared to count. His name was Cornelius Fudge.

Today there were well over one hundred brave souls standing on the deck of the MS Polarfront. This ship was one of many on route. They would be the vanguard, the first to die and the last to leave.

Cornelius Fudge faced forwards as the salty sea air blasted around him. His Great great grandfathers enchanted armor protecting him against the biting cold. Yet against seemingly all forms of logic the Ex minister still chose to keep on his green Bowler hat. At least it helped draw attention from the bandolier of grenades slung across his chest.

" Commander Fudge, the forces are ready."

"So they are, how long?"

"Five minutes until advance deployment. The Scarecrow corps are already in position. They were able to get close under the false pretense of a live fire exercise with the JSDF"

"Is that all mister Weasly?"

"Not quite, we've found the body of an fellow Auror in the field, Rabastan Lestrange"

"Where?"

"Two blocks from the strike point"

"Very well then. I will deal with this matter personally."

As the ship came to the rendezvous point a flash of green light erupted up into the air. Their ranks thinned as wizards began to apparate into position, several helicopters came by for the friendly vampires to latch onto and some one thought it was a good idea to teach to goblins how to use Jet packs. The mission was a go.

Minister Fudge took one last breath and then he apparated to the strike zone. There was still a war to win.

Whether by accident or by design ex minister of Magic Cornelius fudge appeared atop the body of Rabastan. The Aurror's blood was still sickeningly fresh. Minister fudge picked up the fallen worriers blade and repaired it. It was a copy that would soon fade. Yet Mr. Fudge couldn't think of any weapon on this earth he'd be prouder to wield.

Shrieks came from all around. American marines and JSDF forces were scrambling to evacuate any left over civilians from the area. Sailor scouts could be seen jumping from rooftop to rooftop. Annihilating any vampires foolish enough to impede the evacuation. Finally a tank of indeterminate nature could be seen firing on monsters made from writhing flesh.

Minister Fudge set to work immediately. According to mission intel there were two enemy forces at the strike zone. The Sabbat vampire clans and the Camarilla, both of which were natural enemies and Tokyo had become their battleground. The ministry of magic was here to put a stop to that.

Blood coated the earth, fire was all around, and the undead tore at each other like mad beasts. Around 10 meters away a group of blood magic users battled against monsters that could craft the flesh of their enemies. Nearer still living shadows struck out against animalistic monsters with more tentacles then Cornelius was comfortable with.

Fudge charged forward, cleaving through flesh with his blade and sending the monsters reeling with his wand. Their shadows weren't half as fast as Cornelius's blade. Sparks and flames from his wand purged the undead with brutal efficiency. Charred skeletons were all he left behind.

Murdering their friends and enemies alike sure did get the other vampires attention. The vampire warlocks responded with flames, and the flesh crafting Tzimisce tried to pierce fudge with tentacles made from living flesh.

The flames were rendered harmless by a quick flame-freezing charm. Meanwhile all but one of the tentacles was cut down by Fudges blade. That last errant tentacles however pierced fudges left side. It moved around rapidly to turn his insides to jelly.

It was Cornelius however who got the last laugh. In his final death throes the aging wizard managed to pull the pin on his bandolier of enchanted grenades. Several members of the kindred were about to get a taste of fiend fire.

Cornelius swore that if he ever met Arthur Weasely in that great beyond he'd have to thank the man. The look on the vampire's faces as the grenades went off was priceless.


	16. Magic is Might pt 3

**Moon**

Shadows, "You have to wake up". Darkness, "It's going to be okay". The Voice of a lover, "Please, please wake up". The desperate voice of a loved one, "I'll lead them away".

Usagi fell asleep in her bed. She woke up to ashes. Tuxedo Mask stood next to her. The wall to the left side of her was gone. Gunfire, screams, explosions, and cackling flames shook her out of a funny dream. She dreamt that everything was okay. That her friends were all by her side, and now it was time to wake up.

She transformed, got onto her feet, and looked out at what was left of Tokyo.

"How many are left?"

"Enough", answered Tuxedo Mask.

"The scouts?"

"All still alive. They could use some one to lead them"

Moon nodded and leapt outside. The vampires at street level were annihilated by a flurry of over a dozen roses that embedded themselves into the ground. Sailor moon ran past them without a second glance. She didn't have time to die.

 **Mars**

Rei wasn't sure any thing could drown out the sounds of those screams. That is until she heard the sound of the 1st Tank battalion. The type ten didn't come quietly. When its 120 mm gun spoke the enemy listened. Backing up the armored unit was the 1st, 32nd, 34th Infantry Regiments, and 1st artillery regiment was awaiting clearance to bring the pain.

It was in this kind of environment that Rei Hino fought against the undead. A mountain of steel and manpower formed to push the undead forces back. Terrors that defied human thought were no match for HEAT rounds and the purifying flame of Sailor Mars.

A wave of human bodies crashed against the creatures of the night. Hyper velocity ammunition, high explosives and incendiary rounds purged the earth. Every now and then Marines would join their numbers as the tired soldiers broke their way through the Undead to reach the main strike force.

Air support was inbound, Colonel Kurosawa had deployed WAIR, and allied forces were making a push from the other side of the city. This force was the tip of the spear. The first real blow they'd been able to deliver against the undead.

Tokyo might be city in flames, humans might be the prey for the moment, and yet this fight it is far from over. The Senshi of fire refused to take one step back. Rei Hino refused to lose the city that she loved.

 **Mercury**

The bodies surrounding that scarred building were truly without number. Countless torn limbs, bits of entrails, and so very many shredded black uniforms were stacked high. The chatter of fully automatic weapons fire could be heard from the complex. Some of them must have been alive. Some one was still fighting.

Ami walked over the piles of dead bodies and slowly entered the building. No more then forty troops remained. They didn't seem to mind her presence. Until she spoke up none of them seemed to even notice her.

"Does any one here speak Japanese or English?"

"I do", said a woman with a British accent. The woman stopped wrapping up her arm in the corner and picked up her machine gun. As she walked towards Ami the full extent of her injuries became clear. She was a woman living on borrowed time. Still moving when her body should have given out long ago. The will to fight driving her forward when all else had failed.

"You must be looking for the evacuation forces. They passed through here a few minutes back. We haven't heard from them since."

"Do you know where they might be?"

The woman in black shouted a few phrases in Thai to the Neighboring soldiers who all picked up their weapons and walked towards Mercury.

"They will show you the way", said the woman.

The woman then turned towards the window and let out a long burst of machine gun fire at the undead. Soon her weapon ran dry and she drew a belt of ammunition from off the floor.

"Go"

The woman put the ammunition into the weapon, "Chad". Pointed the weapon at the undead, "Sassana". Pulled the trigger, "Pramahakasat".

"Go!", she screamed.

Ami and the soldiers left through the back. The soldiers were running as fast as they could. They weaved their way through rubble as the sound of machine gun fire faded into the distance. Then, it stopped. A moment later the low rumble of an explosion could be heard.

As Sailor Mercury ran behind her escorts she felt a drop of water hit her. It was raining today.

 **Jupiter**

Sailor Jupiter didn't feel like celebrating. The vampires were dead and so were most of the marines. Everywhere she looked young kids had paid the ultimate price. They didn't ask for this, they never wanted to die face down in pools of blood, but they did the best they could. God help them, they were barely nineteen.

Makoto could hear crying children. She could feel the rain. Hopefully it could wash away all this blood. The strongest of the Senshi felt so powerless. She couldn't help every one. People were dead. Makoto heard some one coming.

She got ready to take another life. One more dead body today, or a hundred, or a thousand. It was getting so hard to care any more. Jupiter got ready and then she stopped. It was Mercury and a few badly wounded soldiers.

Jupiter smiled for the first time all morning. Everything was going to be okay.

 **Venus**

"Rei, where are you?".

They were in an abandoned apartment building. Every hallway was kill zone. This was their sniper nest. If they lost this then they'd lose the whole city block. Every room was a warzone and Mina was finally getting tired.

"Grenade!", screamed a young private.

Without a second thought the Private threw themselves on it. Their death was meaningless. The shrapnel still had enough bite to go through him and the next few soldiers.

"They're in 'ere", grunted a brute.

Venus looked towards young men next to her. Brujah were in the next room. Violent vampires that make a heck of a mess, and Mina didn't care. She was with the SAS.

"Who dares wins", shouted Venus.

She closed the ground between them before they were ready. The Brujah loved a good brawl. Well so did she. Some big dumb biker tried to smash her head in. Instead she grabbed his arms and pulled them free from their sockets. Then she kicked him back and lunged towards the next enemy.

This brute had a shotgun, she had something special for him too. "Venus!", she pointed her hands at his crotch, "Love and Beauty Shock!".

"Looks like their going to have to glue you back together, in hell", taunted Venus.

The remaining Brujah charged Venus. They were really putting her through her paces. Dodge that crow bar, don't get shot, does that guy have a chain too, and now she has to dodge that crow bar again.

Mina was getting tired of this.

"Sergent Jenkins!", she yelled as she dodged another poorly timed attack. "Ladies and chaps wearing leather, five rounds rapid!".

Venus commando rolled away from her attackers and the SAS opened fire. For a while it looked like the bullets were doing nothing. Then Venus picked two Minimi light machine guns from the floor to bury them in lead.

"Why won't you just die!"

Shell casings hit the floor and the soldiers kept on firing until their barrels were red. Then they stopped. All but one of the Brujah was dead. She must have been a rather high ranking vampire to survive this long.

Obviously normal ordinance wasn't up to the task. Ami dropped the two LMG's and picked up a .50 cal sniper from the floor.

"Smile", said Venus.

A typical 7.62 round makes an entry whole the size of a penny and an exit whole the size of a grape fruit. When Venus hit the Brujahs head with the fifty cal., it was messy.

Mina took a deep breath and stretched out a bit. She'd be here all day.

 **Neptune & Uranus**

"Well, they're all dead"

"Yes they are", agreed Michuru.

Both Michuru and Haruka had stumbled onto a subway tunnel. It would appear the expendable sailor scouts had all died fighting a swarm of vampires. They were all accounted for, except for one.

 **Saturn**

Hotaru liked making friends. It's because she liked making friends that she was in a Mako tank right now. Of course she was having a bit of trouble driving it and she'd killed more vampire by running them over then actually shooting them. It was the thought that counted though. Saturn really, really wanted to kill vampires.

 **Pluto**

In the Minato ward of Tokyo things weren't going so well. Vampires of numerous clans were slaughtering each other and the entire city of Tokyo was collateral damage. Storm clouds stalked overhead. Nothing could put out these fires. Not even the pouring rain could wash the city clean.

In the middle of Minato ward the fighting had crushed part of the area flat. It was here that the blood really flowed. Where the bodies stacked higher and higher in mockery of Tokyo's skylines. Where the ministry was waging a desperate fight against all odds. It was here that a time portal opened.

Out came Pluto's "reinforcements". 100,000 Krogan riding T-Rex's led by Grunt who was also riding a T-Rex burst through the gate. Right as they swarmed out the Strike force also came to point. The Artillery finally opened up as well. The JSDF had moved all able-bodied units to the area, the U.S. had deployed every thing they had in the area as well, and the Royal Thai Army finally got to show its bite.

It was beautiful. Then something magical happened. Sailor Pluto used the communicator call in the sailors and Venus brought a few friends. They rallied atop the rubble of Mamochan's old apartment building. Soon Sailor Mini Moon, the Sailor Quartet, and the Sailor Constellations showed up as well.

"Every one, there's something I want to say", said Usagi.

She looked to all her friends, her new friends, and random SAS soldiers. Her daughter was here too. She was so proud of her. With this in mind Usagi knew what she needed to say.

"Let's go kill some vampires!"

The undead didn't have a prayer. Heavy tank fire threw around the kindred like toys, T-rex's chomped on ghouls, and the Sailors finally brought their offensive power to bear. The Sailor Senshi Fucked shit up.

Love and justice had triumphed again.


	17. Unforgettable Moments

**AN:** The Following story contains a Meanwhile at the Time Gate segment brought to you by Ka'Dira Ezra. As in she wrote it and that's why its way more awesome then this entire story. If you are a fan of Mass Effect universe then be sure to check out her story Forever and Ever, Amen.

* * *

What a wonderful time of year in Tokyo. The city was rebuilt and people were trying their best just to get by. They were going to movies, spending time with loved ones, playing video games.

No one brought up what had happened a few months ago. It had become a societal taboo to even mention the incident known to the press as The Bloodless Night. It got its name because not a single civilian was lost in the entire military operation. Not counting the post war psych casualties, or the unexplained disappearances. They were talked about even less then the incident itself.

Life gradually went back to normal. People pretended they were trying to remember in order to help them forget. That Memorial no one visited, a few footnotes added to the next generation of school books, and veterans clinics far off the beaten path. In a few months it was almost as if it had never happened.

That is unless you were a soldier, then you remembered. Across the sea or in a far off land it still came to you. It didn't discriminate. It was fair, some might even say accommodating, and some times it was like it wasn't even there. Then it was back. Clothing stuck tight to you. You needed somebody to help. Some one to understand, and that's why they gathered.

Venus was at the Karaoke machine, Captain price at the bar, and Harry potter by the Jukebox on some nights. Didn't say much to each other because they didn't have to. Sailor V might sing her sad little song. The old soldier could buy you a pint. The mysterious foreigner might just tell you a tale stranger then fiction.

The nights were long and the air was stale. This was where they went on nights when they couldn't forget. This was where they went to remember.

* * *

Rei Hino pretended she'd fallen asleep. She pretended not to hear some one clumsily climb into her bed, and didn't make a noise as arms wrapped tight around her. Some one was in her bed with her. They couldn't forget, they didn't know how to ask for help, they didn't know how to say "I love you".

When morning came that some one was still wrapped tight around Rei. After a night of drinking they'd finally found the courage to say what they'd wanted to say since the first moment they laid eyes on her.

"Rei Hino", whispered Mina, "I love you"

* * *

Makoto Kino heard allot of funny sounds when she woke up this morning. She'd slept on top of the temple roof. Not the softest place to rest your head. Still it did have one saving grace. Makoto smiled as she saw the beauty of the rising sun.

"You okay?"

When Makoto heard that she nearly fell of the roof. Almost, and that's why she lived long enough to get to see something else beautiful this morning.

"Ami?"

The blue haired Senshi blushed in embarrassment. Hopefully her friend wouldn't ask too many hard questions about why she was up here.

"Yeah, its me"

The two sat there for a little while in contented silence. Both of them were enjoying each other's company along with the view.

"You know Makoto, I used to not understand why you'd sleep out here. Now, I get it"

Ami reached out to hold her friends hand, Makoto returned the gesture, and together they sat back to watch the world look so beautiful. It's nice to have friends.

* * *

Usagi giggled as she led a blind folded Mamoru up the temple steps. She didn't even bother taking off the blindfold until she'd caught her breath at the top. Surprising people was hard work.

As soon as the blindfold came off Mr. Chiba looked around in befuddlement.

" Is the surprise you led me all the way to the temple before taking my blind fold off?"

"No silly, its . . ."

Usagi fished around in her pockets for a while. She muttered a bit, and then pulled out a plastic white object in triumph. She put it so close in front of Mamoru's face that he had no trouble making out what it was.

"Mamoru, I'm Pregnant"

"Usagi, are you sure you read the directions right?"

"Of course I read the directions right. I'm not stupid!"

"Well, Usagi we haven't errr . . . been passionate for a while. So how could you be pregnant?"

It all came back to Usagi in a flash. One crazy night in London, half a dozen bottles of something stronger then whiskey, and a certain Mr. Longbottem.

"You're right Mamo-chan. Must've misread the directions. Heh-heh, silly me. I'll just go home and BURN this."

"Okay. I do have one question before we go home though, why'd you bring me here?"

"Well I was worried you wouldn't take it well. So I brought you here in case I had restrain you or something. Haruka and Michuru are over there inside the temple. Also Hotaru is some where with a tranquilizer gun. She's great at hide and seek".

"Do I even want to what Setsuna's part in this plan was?"

Usagi started walking home. Mamoru followed. Both of them unaware that operation put the fear of god into Mamoru was still on stand by.

 **Meanwhile at the gate of time**

Sailor Pluto was the guardian of the time stream. She prided herself on being able to handle a variety of situations. At the moment though she was a bit out of her depth. She never claimed any innate ability to control: a strong willed woman with raven black hair and fierce green eyes, a one ton bipedal reptilian alien with four testicles, or a T-Rex.

So Pluto just cut her losses, pulled out her I-phone 16, and started recording just how F***ed up the whole situation was for future reference.

"Grunt, buddy... you've already been riding the T-Rex for hours now. It's my turn."

"Sorry, battlemaster. I have tamed this mighty beast, and it only responds to my commands."

"No it doesn't. It only does that because you keep feeding it hunks of varren. Seriously, let me have a turn." *Cora moves towards Grunt's T-Rex.*

"Don't make me have my T-Rex attack you Shepard. It would be an honorable death, but your pretty asari would be really mad at me."

"Whatever, Grunt. I could take you AND that T-Rex. Now get off and let me have a turn before I ground you both!"

"Battlemaster, I don't think you can ground a T-Rex."

"Oh yeah? Just watch me."

Pluto didn't have any words for what happened next. But she sure was glad she'd recorded it. This was so going to make the best extranet video's of 2169 list. Take that Volus falls stairs!


	18. The Price of Victory

**AN:** The Following story contains Cora Shepard from Ka'Dira Ezra's story Forever and Ever Amen. If you are a mass effect fan then you should have look at Forever and Ever Amen. It's really good.

* * *

 **Meanwhile At the Gate Of Time**

"So you're saying I'm stuck here"

"That is more or less correct"

"Grunts gone, transporting a T-rex was child's play for you, but now I'm stuck here?"

"Some one has been messing with my Garnet staff. Soon as I find out who it is I'll send you back. Also you're not exactly stuck here. You can go any where you'd like, except home"

"That's the one place I want to go"

"I know, and I'm sorry, but we've all got to make sacrifices today. You can stay at my place until we get this all sorted out."

The life of a Spectre was a hard one. It wasn't being stranded that pissed off Shepard. It was the thought of spending one more moment without Liara by her side. She wanted to come home. To hold the one she loved in her arms once more. Why did the Space Time continuum have to be such a dick today of all days? Why today?

Shepard could use a drink.

 **Bad part of Tokyo**

Captain Price was having himself a pint at the bar when some pretty looking woman walks up to him. She's young enough to be his granddaughter. What could she possibly want with an old soul like him?

"Listen", she said in hushed tone, " I need your help".

"What do you want?"

"I need you to watch my little sister while I'm away for the day"

Now it all made sense. Today was Valentines Day. This pretty miss no doubt had some one she had to go out with. Mean while he had nothing better to do then sit here, drink, remember, and drink. He missed Soap.

"That it?", gruffly remarked Price.

"Yeah", said Mina, " that's it"

"Right then, I'll do it. But on one condition, you seem like a well-connected woman. The kind that'd have allot of friends around here. If any of your friends ever run into Sailor V I want them to tell her not to sing My Way every single bloody night".

Mina smiled mischievously, "Oh, I think that can be arranged".

 **Liver Pool**

"You know what you did!", growled Pluto as she strangled a welsh mage.

Negi tried in vain to loosen her death grip on him. When did she get so strong? As black spots erratically appeared in his vision Negima started to lose all hope. Then he saw Chisame who was following a butterfly briefly come into his line of sight.

'That's it', he thought, 'just a little closer. Now turn around, please turn around'. The butterfly went the other direction. 'Why?', thought Negima as the defender of space and time continued to throttle him.

Today Negima just wasn't feeling the love. Guess this just wasn't one of those stories.

 **Setsuna's Dank Crib**

Shepard changed the channel for the fiftieth time. The only thing on TV today was love stories. Shepard wanted to puke. She'd rather see Blasto 15 then sit through this stuff. Why did everything have to remind her of Li?

She was slowly going mad from being cooped up inside. So Shepard went for a walk. Which was a huge mistake. First off she had no idea where she was going. Her second problem was that everywhere she went there were cute young couples enjoying Valentines day. Some things never do change.

Finally at her wits end Shepard decided to make a mad dash for the first place she figured might sell booze. It was a dark shady bar in the bad part of Tokyo with some bizarre characters in it. For example there was this one kid with dark hair who was giving her a wicked case of déjà vu. He had the most distinctive emerald green eyes.

Shepard ordered the strongest thing they had. Then she remembered she had no way to pay. Her little problem was solved when she heard a gruff voice speak up.

"I'll pay for it"

The person next to Shepard slammed some Yen on the table. They were old. Their beard and epic porn stache was the first thing she noticed. Over all they had a Zaeed kind of feel. They also didn't seem too interested in her.

"Also I'll have one of what ever she's having"

"You sure, it's pretty strong"

"I can handle it".

The bar owner passed both of them a mug. Shepard downed it in a single gulp. Captain price took a sip and nearly passed out.

"Bloody 'ell. What'd they put in that? Radioactive sludge? I've got to babysit tonight. How am I going to-"

Captain price fell back wards out of their seat. Shepard helped them get back up.

"Listen, I always settle my debts. How about I help you get where you need to go and we'll call it even"

"Yeah", murmured Captain Price.

Two badasses stumbled out of a bar in search of Hikawa shrine. If that doesn't put a chill down your spine then you obviously aren't a member of the Tokyo police force.

 **Abandoned Funhouse in the U.K.**

"I . . . I think we lost her".

Negi really needed a new pair of pants. He was stuck in a fun house. Everything was so deathly still that all you could hear was quick short breaths and the sound of your own heartbeat. Then they heard a creak.

"It's probably nothing"

A key exploded through the wall behind them.

"Here's Pluto!"

 **Hikawa Shrine**

Kara walked outside to meet her baby sitter. Mina had said they were of average height, well built, had a hat, and a sweet beard. She recognized him immediately.

She didn't recognize the woman who was with him however. She was petite but also very well built. She had raven hair and green eyes. Something about her seemed to say, follow me.

"Who are you?"

"I'm mister Price. I'll be your baby sitter for tonight"

"Ok, who are you?"

"Cora Shepard, I'm here to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid"

Kara took all of this surprisingly well. Having an older sister like Minako had given her a pretty good weirdness censor.

"Well, I was supposed to go to one of my friends parties tonight. I think my sister forgot about it".

Captain price got down on one knee in front of Kara. "Don't you worry little missy. We'll get you to your party on time".

Captain Price pulled out a cellphone and pressed speed dial.

"Nikolai, I need transport to a little kids birthday party."

Several minutes later a helicopter could be heard approaching.

 **Affordable Restaurant**

"I wonder how Kara's doing", mumbled Mina.

Rei held Mina's hand.

"I'm sure She'll be fine"

 **Shingo's Birthday Party**

Captain price kicked down the door and Shepard stormed in with her assault rifle at the ready. Some poor clown who spooked Cora was thrown across the room by her biotics. Outside Nikolai was still hovering above the house to provide air support.

Mama Bear Ikuko Tsukino walks into the kitchen at this very moment to grab Shinjo's cake.

"What do you two think you are doing?"

"Infiltrating", answered Price.

"Fighting clowns", answered Shepard.

Kara started waving at Ikuko to get her attention. "Hi Miss Tsukino. I'm so sorry. These two are my escorts because my sister was busy tonight. Am I too late for the party?"

"No, actually you're the first one here. Usually we celebrate Shinjo's party on his actual birthday. But we had a family emergency and we kept on pushing the party back weekend after weekend. Everything's been so crazy lately. We threw it today and none of his other friends could show. At least you're here though."

Miss Tsukino frowned.

"Now where did I put that knife?"

Corra activated her Omni blade.

"I can help with that"

 **Meanwhile At the Gate of Time**

Pluto's Garnet rod was finally working again. Now all she needed to do was find Shepard and get her back home. That could wait though. First she had to make a surprise visit to a birthday party. After all, some body had to escort Hotaru and Chibi- Usa there. Who better then the guardian of time and space?

 **Shingo's Belated Birthday Bash**

"Mom, mom, guess who's here!"

Ikuko walked upstairs to find that Pluto, Hotaru, and Chibi-Usa had arrived. They'd all brought gifts to give to Shingo. There were now three big ones in the corner, as well as a little one from Kara, a strangely shaped one, and a small bag with a bow on it.

"All of your friends have arrived. How wonderful. Well, all of your other important friends have arrived. No offense Kara"

"None taken"

Pluto smiled and nonchalantly wiped the blood off her hands and onto the back of her uniform. It'd disappear that way when she detransformed. Oh, the joys of brutally exploiting ancient and powerful magic.

"Would you like to unwrap your presents now?", asked Pluto innocently.

Shingo nodded enthusiastically and tore the big boxes open. A chemistry kit from Hotaru, a Sailor Moon uniform from Chibi Usa, and an Hazmat suit from Pluto.

Not to be deterred by these oddly specific gifts Shingo decided to open the rest. The decapitated head of General Shepard, a book on how to kiss girls from Kara, and an bag of remarkably fresh clowns teeth.

"Thanks guys", said Shingo.

Best super traumatizing party ever!

 **Later At the Gate of Time**

"Well, I should go"

"That is correct"

" I'll be back home with Liara?"

"That's how it works"

"You think you could send me to my home at the start of Valentines Day?"

Pluto gave a predatory grin.

"Oh, that can be arranged".


	19. Old Souls

Captian Price was having a smoke by the bay. Did the sun always look this beautiful? Maybe life finally decided to cut him a check. Captain Price put out his cigar and turned around.

That blonde woman from the bar was out here too.

She smiled, "It's beautiful out here, isn't it?"

"Yeah", said Captain Price, "It sure is".

Mina just chuckled. Her smile was like the seas breeze. Her hair was like the sun. Something about her wasn't right though. Price could see something in her eyes.

"Where'd you learn to smile like that?"

"I've been practicing for a while. It gets easier with time"

"Does it really?"

"Pretending does"

Captain Price nodded, "It certainly does".

Mina dropped the act and walked up next to Price. She wanted to see things his way. Maybe he had a clearer view. He didn't, the view was different though.

"Why'd you stay here?"

"I didn't have any where else to go, you?"

"Its where I was meant to be. I'm just a soldier at heart I suppose. I've spent my whole life putting duty above all else."

"You, a soldier?"

"You'd be surprised"

Captain price gave her a second look. That must be it. She reminded him of some one.

"What's your name?"

"Venus"

"What the hell kind of name is Venus?"

"One that not many know"

Captain Price put an arm around Mina's shoulder. As he looked out at the sun he swore it wouldn't happen again. Gaz, Griggs, Kamarov, Ghost, Roach, Yuri, and Soap were all gone. It stopped here. This one would live.

" I'm John Price, and I've been alive way too bloody long"

"That makes two of us"

It cold, it was beautiful, and it was unlike anything they'd ever seen. No one had to die today. There was no war to win. They didn't have to watch their friends sacrifice themselves. They weren't alone either. Well, she wasn't at least.

"So what happens now?"

"What do you mean?" asked John gruffly.

"Between us"

"You're young. Go out there and live your life. I know there's some one who cares about you and they're not here. I'm just an old man Venus, one who's nearing the end. That's about all there is, between us."

"Can I still talk to you?"

"Of course, I'll be here for a while. I'm not leaving any time soon"

Venus started shaking a bit.

"I've got a question. This some one I care about, it's complicated. I work along side her. We've been through so much together. I just got the courage to tell her how I feel, but I'm worried. What happens if I have to put duty first, and I have to take her life again?"

"Don't worry about tomorrow. It'll all burn down no matter what you do. Just enjoy the time you have with her while there's still time left. Before their all just ghosts and memories"

Venus nodded several times. She gave John a kiss on the cheek, told him "Thanks", and then left. Thank god that Soap never kissed him like that. That probably would have been against regulation. Not to mention incredibly awkward.

Captain price had become a father figure to some one he'd just met, and all he wanted to do was watch the bloody sunrise. Figures, at least it beat Pripyat though.

Price was lost in thought when a white van showed up out of nowhere.

"Hey old man, want to see a dead body?"

"Venus?"

Mina hopped out of the van, threw the side door open and then threw Price in. Before the old soldier had time to gather their wits she'd already closed the door. The engine started and they were off.

"How did you? You were just with me three minutes ago."

"I can run faster then cars. But that's not important. What's important is that you are going on a blind date."

"You've got to be kidding me"

"We will be arriving at the Tuxedo place in just a moment."

"Why are their Chains in here?"

"Insurance, any ways we've arrived. Now get out of the van."

Under threat of a Venus Kick, Captain price exited the vehicle. The sign of the place read Tux Boys low end Luxury Tuxedo's. Price had never seen so many tacky suits in his life.

"I'm not going in there"

"Have it your way"

She Venus kicked him back into the van and locked him in. When the door came back open Mina had a nice suit in her hands.

"Put it on"

"In the van?"

Mina was getting tired of playing nice. So she just hopped in, tore the clothes off his body, and put the suit on as she muffled his screams. To her credit he looked pretty spiffy by the end of it all.

"Are you mental?"

"You look great, now time to get you down town".

Mina closed everything up, hopped in the drivers seat and gunned the engine. As they journeyed Captain price started feeling the spirit of romantic chivalry. He quickly deduced the source. Ok, held captive by a super human reality warper determined to get you laid. That was a new one.

The van came to a sudden stop. Mina got out and opened the door.

"You're lady awaits"

John gave her a strange look and got out of the vehicle. He could see a few block away there was some one waiting for him. She was well dressed with long light brown hair. Walked over to meet her.

"Excuse me mam, I was wondering if you'd like some company. My names John Price, what might yours be?"

"Haruna Sakurada"

"Well, how about you and I go some where more accommodating. I now a place"

Like a perfect gentleman Mister Price led her to a nice fancy restaurant to wine her and dine her. She was a schoolteacher, he was a retired soldier, and together they found love. Venus of course did the honorable thing and left the two of them to enjoy each other's company in peace. It's not like she followed them or anything. Mina had better things to do.

There was some one waiting for Mina at Hikawa shrine. Some one it felt like she'd known for a lifetime. Some one she cared for. This special some one knew just how important duty was all too well. They'd both sworn their loyalty to Usagi and were prepared to fight on until the bitter end.

Mina was young in body and old in spirit, but maybe, just maybe, she might be able to learn how to love again.


	20. Magical Maladies

The helicopters came overhead. Countless commando's came down the ropes hanging from the helicopters. It was pretty remarkable that nothing pant wreckingly terrible happened. Especially considering who this house belonged to.

Some one politely knocked on the door and waited. Meanwhile the rest set up breaching charges around the back. After a lengthy pause some poor sod came to the door. Every one stopped moving and stayed still.

Mister Ron Weasley opened the door to find the barrel of a gun right up against his face.

"I don't suppose you're here with the delivery"

"Ron Weasley you are wanted for upsetting the balance of time space continuum. We're here to take you in"

" You're SAS aren't you. I could've sworn you were on our side"

"Quit your whining and step out with your hands up. I hope you spent some quality time with your family recently. Let's just say you won't be seeing them for a while"

"Is this a joke?"

"Of course it's a joke, pardon me for not laughing."

The rest of the men started undoing the charges while the polite SAS officer led Mister Weasley outside. They secured the pansy and headed out. No point waiting around or anything. There was so much to do and so little time.

The Heli's took them over sea and over land. Soon they were dropped off on an aircraft carrier. A Sailor with long green hair was waiting. About thirty feet above the deck they decided to just drop Ron out of the helicopter, he lived.

"Why did that hurt so much?"

"Because your knee caps have been broken" politely informed Pluto.

"My Knee caps are, oh please no!"

The key went down and Ron's knee was obliterated. Oversized keys sure can do allot of damage to bone and soft tissue.

"What do you want?", cried out Ron.

"Tell me where Harry is", Pluto demanded.

"What makes you think I'd"

Pluto broke the other knee.

"I'd never-"

Now the guardian of time raised up her key, and brought it down right between his legs.

"Bugger!", screamed Ron.

The guardian of time and space raised up her bloody key again. She readjusted where it was aiming. This one would be a kill shot.

"One last chance"

"I'm, I'm so sorry Mione"

The key came down with skull crushing force. It ever so barely missed Ron's head. It swerved out of the way at the last second to bury itself into the floor of the aircraft carrier.

Ron started bawling like a child. He was shuddering so violently Pluto almost confused it for a seizure.

"In recognition for your bravery I've decided to spare your life, Ronald Bilius Weasley. Don't make me regret it"

Pluto started to walk away.

"What about my legs?"

"All wounds heal with time"

"How will I get home?"

"You're a wizard, figure it out"

The pot bellied washed up ex auror had a strong urge to beat himself for not thinking of that sooner. The trouble is that his wand had been damaged from the fall. As he pulled it out memories of his second years at Hogwarts came flooding back. He just hoped that enough of him would reach home for Rose and Hugo to have a bit of fatherly love in their lives.

When your already half the man you used to be, you're not exactly bursting with excitement to become a seventh of that. So as Ron cast the spell he hoped for the best.

Good news is he ended up in one piece. Bad news is he didn't end up home. Instead he showed up at a girl's bathhouse without any clothes on.

He expected screaming, his own awkward apologies, and a long list of things he had to confess to Hermione when he got home. That's not quite what happened. There was only one person in the bathhouse. She was tall and had brown hair. She wasn't screaming but neither was she blinking.

"You need a towel?"

"That would be much appreciated"

Ron accepted the towel and then stood there awkwardly.

"I'm so screwed"

Makoto had no idea what was going on, why a fat naked man had showed up out of nowhere holding a stick, or why she'd just so happened to have spare towel laying around. Still she was a hero and helping people is what she did.

"Ok, you look lost. I'll take you back to my apartment and you can explain to me exactly how you got here"

The very confused Wizard nodded. Today was just one of those days.

 **Meanwhile at the Gate of Time**

"You sure that wasn't a bit over kill?", asked Luna.

"It was necessary", answered Pluto.

"Maybe next time you could just knock", offered Artemis.

"We did knock", clarified Pluto.

The cats exchanged locks.

"So you're saying", began Luna, "That it was necessary to kidnap him and break his legs, just so he could help out at a bake sale?"

"This bake sail will help build the confidence Chibi moon needs to be a good leader one day. The very future of Crystal Tokyo hangs in the balance. We needed the Weasley family recipe. I did what I had to do"

"Asking nicely wouldn't have worked?", asked Luna

"You are absolutely right. I should've realized that sooner with all my centuries of experience. Now Luna, would you ever so kindly remind me why you haven't been spade yet?"

Luna backed up

"Your right Pluto, you did what you had to do"

"That's what I thought"

 **Tokyo Bake Sail**

Ron Weasely was currently in a wheel chair helping Chibi-Usa out with her bake sale. Just as planned.

Everything was selling well. A huge profit was made. Ron still didn't have his balls back. How was he going to explain that to St. Mungo's, or Hermione, or Harry? George would never let him live this down.

Still he was finally making himself use full for the first time in 5 or 6 years, and that's what counts. Not to mention he wouldn't have to keep on looking up the birth control spell he kept on messing up. Every one wins!

Except for Ron's balls.


	21. Furry Friends

**AN:** The idea for this chapter come from Fanfic Author TheElephantInThePrideParade. Their work is absolutely amazing. That's not an hyperbole, its a slightly biased true fact.

* * *

"Ami, we need to talk".

"How did you get in here?"

"You left a window open. There is something I need to tell you. What you need to know is-"

Venus clutched her chest and started groaning, and then Artemis burst out of her shirt covered in blood. Artemis landed on the floor and started squirming around, trying to get back on its feet

"Good", panted Artemis, "I was starting to get claustrophobic in there"

Venus winced in pain and grumbled, "Artemis is in my shirt"

"What?"

"He's been acting strange lately. After I fed him this morning he started licking things and rolling around. Then he burrowed into my shirt"

Ami gave Mina a quizzical look. Not long after that the braniac took out a note pad and started flipping through the pages.

"Catnip"

"What about it?"

"It's the reason Artemis has been acting so strange. Some one must have over loaded it with energy to prolong its effects."

"Why would some one do that?"

Artemis leapt back into mina's shirt through the whole in the front. The wide-eyed moon cat then cried out, "No one can take me from my bungalow!"

Ami tapped her fingers against the note pad.

"I think they must've been trying to cause some sort of distraction. The trouble is that we don't know their motives or what they're after"

"Hold on", said Mina, "You mentioned that they prolonged the effects of the catnip using energy. Why don't you use your computer to detect the energy and trace it back to its source."

Ami pulled out her mercury computer and started scanning Artemis. After that she put the energy readings into its scanner. "There, now we should be able to triangulate where the source is"

Ami looked up.

"Its right above our heads"

Loud bumping noises were heard and then a teal moon cat burst out of an air duct. They made a quick turn and started sprinting out the door.

"After that Pussy cat!", yelled Mina

"Mercury Crystal Power, Make Up!", called out Mercury.

"Shiver me biggles", added Artemis.

The teal target made its way down the hallway then executed a sharp turn. Mercury charged after it, Mina Leapt out of a window, and Artemis went for broke by tearing off Mina's shirt to use it as Parachute.

Mercury maneuvered her way behind the Cat, got into a kneeling position, and called out "Mercury Aqua Rhapsody".

At that very same moment Venus appeared in front of the cat and got ready to grab the blighter. Instead she was doused by Mercury's watery blast. Mina felt terrible. Victory was uncertain. It looked like the teal moon cat had won. Then, from up above Artemis dropped in to save the day.

"Dun-duh-Dun, Super Cat!"

Artemis landed on top of the teal moon cat and started mauling it. Fur and fluff flew as the two cats went at it. At the end of it all, standing atop the body of the loser, was the teal moon cat. Artemis was semi conscious on the floor muttering, "finish him", over and over and over.

"No more misses nice Mina", growled the still cold blonde. She marched forward and picked up the teal cat to punt it.

"Any last words?", asked Mina as she leered over the fuzzy menace.

"Meow"

"Smart guy huh, we'll see how smart you are by the time I-"

"Mina, its just a cat. You hate people who abuse animals, remember?"

"Oh, yeah. Well let's just grab it then. Also do you have a spare shirt?"

"Of course I do", answered Ami as she walked over and picked up the teal kitty. The two of them walked back inside and Mina grabbed a spare shirt.

"Let us never speak of us again"

"Yes", agreed Ami.

Mina looked at Ami, Ami looked at Mina, and they both realized they'd left Artemis outside. Also they noticed there was tall handsome Native American standing slightly behind the door way. His biker jacket and short hair made him look like a rebel.

"Hey, is this cat yours?"

" He's ours"

"I'm just asking because they look pretty banged up. Like some one beat them or something"

Mina tried to explain things, "The teal cat did it"

"Sure, sure", said Jacob.

The imposing Native American ducked as they walked into the room.

"I'm gonna have to ask you a few questions"

"If it's why I'm with a sailor scout without a shirt on then I assure you there's a perfectly normal non incriminating explanation"

Jacob raised an eyebrow.

"A mostly non incriminating explanation"

The werewolf sighed and put the cat down. He ducked underneath the doorway on his way out and started mumbling something about Imprinting. As he left the room Mina could have sworn she heard the words "Bella", "Catch 22", and "Pedo time Fuckery" used in a single sentence.

Mina looked at the extra large white shirt in her hands. Then she looked at the scratch marks on her chest, and Artemis, and the teal cat. Finally she looked at an very confused Mercury, and she started smiling. It must be Tuesday.


	22. Arbitrary Ending

July 4th, 2017.

Yet another conference today.

Right at this very moment Harry almost envied Ron. The boy who lived, and current head of the Auror office, had no joke shop to flee to. Not to mention his wife wasn't nearly as good with practical matters as Hermione. Bloody brilliant in fight, but that's neither here nor there. Two things extinguished Harry's jealousy. The first was remembering Ron's potbelly and the second was realizing that Ron was Ron. Spiders were probably chasing the poor unfortunate bugger or, failing that, some other hilariously cruel thing must be happening to him right now. Harry would no doubt hear all about it next Christmas party.

"Excuse me Mister potter, is something on your mind?"

"No, of course not Mrs. Aino. You were saying?"

"We need to reinforce the protections at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry. My friends and I were attacked multiple times during our stay there. If that is supposed to be the safest place in magical Brittan then I'd like to know exactly what kind of show you're running"

Harry shuddered for a moment. He knew exactly what she was talking about. At that very instant seven years of his life flashed before his eyes. Maybe the security could do with a bit of refurbishment.

"I'll send my best Goblins to deal with the matter immediately"

"I beg your pardon."

"Goblins, you know. They're usually not very tall, usually not very friendly, fantastic at protecting stuff, and valued allies of the Ministry of Magic"

Mina nodded.

"I'd like to thank you for your time Mr. Potter. It's good to know that some one is doing their job around here. No offense."

"Have a wonderful day Mrs. Aino"

Right after she left some one else came in. This valued citizen was blond, had grey eyes, and a rather Colored history with Harry. Today was just full of surprises.

"Good to see you again Draco". Draco smiled, "Good to see you again too Harry". Both wizards regard each other with a great deal of respect. Harry was impressed by how far Draco had gone to repair old wounds. Draco was impressed that Harry was willing to pretend that there weren't any there. Maybe the boy who lived should have been a Slytherin after all. If only Harry had taken him up on that offer all those years ago. Oh well, no point pondering what could have been.

"Harry, I came here to speak with about a grievous problem affecting our society. While I appreciate all that your organization has done to help matters bad blood still lingers."

"Draco, I'm head of the Auror office not the ministry of Magic. I think you ought to take this up with Shacklebolt instead."

"But don't you see Harry. You're the kind of help we need. Start reaching out to children in dire need of a hero to look up to. Children of dark wizards don't have many heroes these days. All they get is veiled disgust and empty promises. They need a hero, they need you."

"What do you want me to do Draco?"

"Just do something. Go to Hogwarts and make a speech, start recruiting more Slytherins, or let someone know you care. I know you've to got appeal to the majority, I know that you don't like showing favoritism, but we both know what happens when some one has no one else to turn to. What, they turn to"

Harry nodded, "Alright then. I'll see what I can do. Maybe we can fit something in under the premise of maintaining constant vigilance of our nations youth. It won't be as overt a show of support as you'd like but it'll be there"

"Thanks Harry. I've got a feeling they'll be able to pick up on it even if no one else will"

"Even if they're like us?

"Maybe not, but its still something"

Draco and Harry smiled at each other. Perhaps snakes and lions aren't so different after all. It's the badgers you really have to look out for. Trying to run new legislation past them was about as enjoyable as wrestling a Blast-Ended Skrewt naked.

"Good luck, Harry"

"You too, Draco"

Draco left and some one new came in, Albus Dumbledore.

"Are you quite all right my dear boy, you look like you've seen the dead"

"You're . . ."

"Only here for a moment. I've borrowed Mr. Krum for the time being. Before I did so they seemed quite determined to discuss the matter of Broomsticks with you. It should also be mentioned that I had a fair deal of assistance getting here. My compatriots would like you to inform Sailor moon that she is a cantankerous whore."

"Headmaster, I . . ."

"Harry, I just wanted you to know. That I'm proud of you"

Dumbledore's ghostly visage faded away. Now there was Victor Krum in Harry's office. He was a bit confused about how he got there but nonetheless eager to talk to Harry.

"Harry, have you ever considered an mounted Auror force?"

Harry half listened to what Krum was saying, and half thought about what had just transpired. At the end of a rather interesting discussion Mister Potter shook hands with Krum and bid his old friend good bye.

Some days it rained, some days the world looked so beautiful, and today Harry was glad he lived in a world where people still cared for one another. Because caring can make all the difference in the world, and in the end Harry was glad he'd lived long enough to make such wonderful friends.


End file.
